Missing an ex-friend sucks.

[Bleu]

2-years, no longer friends, over 14-years of friendship, new each other since we were 6.

Lonely as heck during the pandemic, but the saddest part is I can't even tell her about my sister who just had a baby. First grandson (my nephew) of the family.

Sucks.

 

[Jojo205]

2-years, no longer friends, over 14-years of friendship, new each other since we were 6.

Lonely as heck during the pandemic, but the saddest part is I can't even tell her about my sister who just had a baby. First grandson (my nephew) of the family.

Sucks.

I’m no longer friends with several girls I’ve known almost my entire life. It’s hard. Hugs <3

 

[fish 321]

Its easy if you don't have friends.

 

[DoubleDutch]

2-years, no longer friends, over 14-years of friendship, new each other since we were 6.

Lonely as heck during the pandemic, but the saddest part is I can't even tell her about my sister who just had a baby. First grandson (my nephew) of the family.

Sucks.

And she isn't reachable / tracable ?

 

[MacZ]

As someone who had to end a friendship after a similar span of time just a month ago... That's how things go.

In my case the pandemic brought us closer than before at first. But I also learned to know him better... It's especially frustrating when a friendship first intensifies but then shows sides of that friend you're repulsed by.

I may be a bit callous, but I learned the hard way that if a longtime friendship ends, it has reasons.

 

[DoubleDutch]

As someone who had to end a friendship after a similar span of time just a month ago... That's how things go.

In my case the pandemic brought us closer than before at first. But I also learned to know him better... It's especially frustrating when a friendship first intensifies but then shows sides of that friend you repulsed by.

I may be a bit callous, but I learned the hard way that if a longtime friendship ends, it has reasons.

Very true

 

[Ouse]

I’m actually coping much better than usual as I’m around less people. I’m not a very sociable person but I think there are ways to enjoy lockdown, even if you are the most sociable person out there. Being in the hobby gives you an enormous head start!

Lockdown gives you time to develop life skills, catch up with relaxation time or projects and learn not to take everything for granted. I’m back in school after months and I feel as if my character has been purified.

 

[ProudPapa]

I guess I've been lucky. I have a few friends I've drifted away from (or vice versa) as our lives took us in different directions, but no friendships that were actively ended by either of us.

I have two friends I've had for over 50 years, and another one for close to 35. I've seen less of all three of them in the pandemic, but we're still friends.

 

[Bleu]

Its easy if you don't have friends.

I don't have any friends at all anymore, I did have one, but even she seems to have faded away. Stings, but that's how my life has been the past few years. Been getting better with the loneliness and acceptance, ha.

And she isn't reachable / tracable ?

She actually doesn't live far for me, but it's been like 2 years now. I'm too prideful to reach out, and I sort am the one who messed up everything back in 2019, then I deleted her off everything middle of it. I think she happily moved on, made new friends, and overall is better without me, I just don't want to disturb that, and feel like I would be rejected.

Plus, the company she keeps I am not the biggest fan of, one who use to try to sabotage our friendship back when we were in High School. Her friends treated me so bad, so I'm sure they'll continue to manipulate her into rejecting me, if I were to reach out and make it right.

When she saw me out in public as she was passing by in a 2 second vehicle, she was looking but hiding. So I'm assuming it's hate, unless that was an awkward response. Sucks.

As someone who had to end a friendship after a similar span of time just a month ago... That's how things go.

In my case the pandemic brought us closer than before at first. But I also learned to know him better... It's especially frustrating when a friendship first intensifies but then shows sides of that friend you're repulsed by.

I may be a bit callous, but I learned the hard way that if a longtime friendship ends, it has reasons.

You're absolutely right.

I’m actually coping much better than usual as I’m around less people. I’m not a very sociable person but I think there are ways to enjoy lockdown, even if you are the most sociable person out there. Being in the hobby gives you an enormous head start!

Lockdown gives you time to develop life skills, catch up with relaxation time or projects and learn not to take everything for granted. I’m back in school after months and I feel as if my character has been purified.

Thank you. I'm glad I got back in the hobby, so far 2 bettas, and just some shrimp. But putting my mind in the hobby again after a a break (former friends made me feel awful for liking fish.) Has been a great thing. I think I probably would've felt absolutely broken if it wasn't for the hobby to keep me occupied, especially loneliness at it's peak.

I guess I've been lucky. I have a few friends I've drifted away from (or vice versa) as our lives took us in different directions, but no friendships that were actively ended by either of us.

I have two friends I've had for over 50 years, and another one for close to 35. I've seen less of all three of them in the pandemic, but we're still friends.

That's unfortunate, do they still chit chat with you? That's awesome though you guys remained friends that long, most people lose friends quickly, but being able to keep people you've always known in my opinion will always be a great thing.

 

[Jojo205]

I don't have any friends at all anymore, I did have one, but even she seems to have faded away. Stings, but that's how my life has been the past few years. Been getting better with the loneliness and acceptance, ha.


She actually doesn't live far for me, but it's been like 2 years now. I'm too prideful to reach out, and I sort am the one who messed up everything back in 2019, then I deleted her off everything middle of it. I think she happily moved on, made new friends, and overall is better without me, I just don't want to disturb that, and feel like I would be rejected.

Plus, the company she keeps I am not the biggest fan of, one who use to try to sabotage our friendship back when we were in High School. Her friends treated me so bad, so I'm sure they'll continue to manipulate her into rejecting me, if I were to reach out and make it right.

When she saw me out in public as she was passing by in a 2 second vehicle, she was looking but hiding. So I'm assuming it's hate, unless that was an awkward response. Sucks.


You're absolutely right.

If you think it’s your fault you’re not friends anymore, I’m sure apologizing would help. Even if she doesn’t accept it, at least you tried. Apologizing and letting the girl I used to be friends with know how she hurt me gave me peace of mind, even if we aren’t friends anymore.

 

[BigManAquatics]

I haven't seen my best friend since 2004. However, we text or contact each other in some way almost everyday and still give each other so much guff you would think we never been apart! People i am not friends with anymore for whatever reason.. i don't miss them.

 

[ProudPapa]

That's unfortunate, do they still chit chat with you? That's awesome though you guys remained friends that long, most people lose friends quickly, but being able to keep people you've always known in my opinion will always be a great thing.

Absolutely.

 

[ZachG]

2-years, no longer friends, over 14-years of friendship, new each other since we were 6.

Lonely as heck during the pandemic, but the saddest part is I can't even tell her about my sister who just had a baby. First grandson (my nephew) of the family.

Sucks.

I had a friend I knew since kindergarten. As soon as we started high school he just stopped talking to me. We even went to monster jam the year before so yeah it sucks. Also two of my grandparents died during the pandemic, my dad has been arrested twice, and I learned I had type one diabetes last summer. Most of life is sucking up to bad things and appreciating whatever good comes out of it.

 

[Bleu]

If you think it’s your fault you’re not friends anymore, I’m sure apologizing would help. Even if she doesn’t accept it, at least you tried. Apologizing and letting the girl I used to be friends with know how she hurt me gave me peace of mind, even if we aren’t friends anymore.

I almost did once, but then I erased the message, especially after when she saw me out and public, and sort of hid. So, now I just leave her alone and let her have her peace. I genuinely think the rejection would make me feel worse instead of closure, tbh.

I haven't seen my best friend since 2004. However, we text or contact each other in some way almost everyday and still give each other so much guff you would think we never been apart! People i am not friends with anymore for whatever reason.. i don't miss them.

Hope that happens with me. Time heals all wounds, so I hope the missing feeling dies away. I think it has been, so that's good even though now I'm missing her now.

I had a friend I knew since kindergarten. As soon as we started high school he just stopped talking to me. We even went to monster jam the year before so yeah it sucks. Also two of my grandparents died during the pandemic, my dad has been arrested twice, and I learned I had type one diabetes last summer. Most of life is sucking up to bad things and appreciating whatever good comes out of it.

Hey, I'm so sorry that you're going through that (and loss), and I really can relate to you. My health has gone downhill too; almost like I'm decorticating (basically, I think my kidneys might be a victim, I spent 4-5 months in bed, not being able to get out, and sicker, which sucks.) Had a loss too during the pandemic that changed a lot.

Life really is short, and that is one of the lessons I've learned, even though I tend to be sad, I do notice myself more appreciative, especially since my health is just falling apart.

Keep your head up.

 

[BenjiBear]

Man i feel this thread deeply

Ive always made friends with the wrong people my entire life and they continued to leave me etc over and over again. It makes it sound like there might be something wrong with me but after years of thinking that I've changed my mind. For example i was friends with a girl who was new in our highschool at the time and she ended up dating one of my loose friends, had issues with him and i made sure i was there for her 24/7 even though i was dealing with my own stuff. I let her stay at my house for 4 days once. Then over the summer she just left me without saying anything and months later tried to reach out again. Nothing had happened she just had moved on from that guy and forgot me.

However i made friends with a girl called Alex online years and years ago. She lived in England (me in Scotland) so we didn't seem worlds apart. We became so close and spoke every single day and called often. She knew every single thing about me and i about her and i mean everything. We were that close for 4 years but unfortunately during our friendship i was dealing with terrible stuff and had awful depression which ended up being taken out on her. She tried to help me and be of comfort for years and i neglected to meet her needs more than i will admit closer to the 4th year. She began to turn very narcissistic because i guess she was (consciously or unconsciously) tired of it always being about me. I didnt realise at the time and took it as an offence. It shattered me but one day I argued with her once again and then told her we had to stop talking. She was a bit shocked but i went ahead and cut contact right there and then.

I moved out to the country, where i am now, shortly after and i began to heal. It wasn't losing her that made that happen it was just my change of circumstance.

I missed her so bad that on several occasions i reached out to her. We breifly spoke and agreed that we both forgave each other and were neutral about it. I told her i missed her and she was surprised.

I still miss her although ive tried to let go so many times as when we spoke it just felt strange and i know we could never get that connection back. It hurt so much and i guess it still does. I suppose i should feel happy that we forgave one another.

I guess in some ways i was in love with her. I dont know on what level but it does sting sometimes. And here i am, still alone i guess.

At the end of the day though, we always have fishlore and all our water babies

Ps. Im sorry for going on but this hasn't been let out in awhile i guess and its 7am :')

 

[Bleu]

H

Man i feel this thread deeply

Ive always made friends with the wrong people my entire life and they continued to leave me etc over and over again. It makes it sound like there might be something wrong with me but after years of thinking that I've changed my mind. For example i was friends with a girl who was new in our highschool at the time and she ended up dating one of my loose friends, had issues with him and i made sure i was there for her 24/7 even though i was dealing with my own stuff. I let her stay at my house for 4 days once. Then over the summer she just left me without saying anything and months later tried to reach out again. Nothing had happened she just had moved on from that guy and forgot me.

However i made friends with a girl called Alex online years and years ago. She lived in England (me in Scotland) so we didn't seem worlds apart. We became so close and spoke every single day and called often. She knew every single thing about me and i about her and i mean everything. We were that close for 4 years but unfortunately during our friendship i was dealing with terrible stuff and had awful depression which ended up being taken out on her. She tried to help me and be of comfort for years and i neglected to meet her needs more than i will admit closer to the 4th year. She began to turn very narcissistic because i guess she was (consciously or unconsciously) tired of it always being about me. I didnt realise at the time and took it as an offence. It shattered me but one day I argued with her once again and then told her we had to stop talking. She was a bit shocked but i went ahead and cut contact right there and then.

I moved out to the country, where i am now, shortly after and i began to heal. It wasn't losing her that made that happen it was just my change of circumstance.

I missed her so bad that on several occasions i reached out to her. We breifly spoke and agreed that we both forgave each other and were neutral about it. I told her i missed her and she was surprised.

I still miss her although ive tried to let go so many times as when we spoke it just felt strange and i know we could never get that connection back. It hurt so much and i guess it still does. I suppose i should feel happy that we forgave one another.

I guess in some ways i was in love with her. I dont know on what level but it does sting sometimes. And here i am, still alone i guess.

At the end of the day though, we always have fishlore and all our water babies

Ps. Im sorry for going on but this hasn't been let out in awhile i guess and its 7am :')

Hey, I'm sorry you had to go through that all. Don't blame yourself for friends that come and go either - I'm glad you both were able to forgive one another. I hope that happens with my friend and I one day.