Getting Burned Out? Or Just Full Of Thoughts...

Hi friends! Now nothing against anyone if you don't know, but I've run a fish reacue (primarily goldfish and especially bettas) for 11 years. I'd experienced burn out before but I'm also always full of thought; new tank ideas, which enclosures to put where, which plants to keep, which fish to keep permanently or adopt out, etc. It's a lot of thinking for a 19-year-old with two autoimmune disorders and many, many things to enjoy!

Anyhow, I'd like a bit of advice. After 11 years, do you think I should take a "break"; meaning, adopt out many fish, upgrade enclosures, "downgrade;" or keep on keepin' on?

I hate this feeling of burning out, but I can't help it. I was forced into responsibility at 2 years old; the health issues of course; but I feel bad for all of the rescued critters I'm currently rehabbing. I want a bit of time to myself, especially with a 6-week break before I return to high school and 4 new college classes on January 5th. However, I must be surrounded by pets at all times; inverts, fish, amphibians, rodents; otherwise I feel empty, lonely, depressed...

Currently, I have 3 common darkling beetles, fun colony of mealworms, an old syrian hamster and a young dwarf, 3 red coral platies, common and flat ramshorn snails, an old man gerbil, 4 female gerbils, red claw crab, 8 goldfish, a paradisefish, 15 bettas, 2 cats, and a TON of plants. I have 38 INDIVIDUAL pets; not including groups/colonies!

Interested in everyone's opinions! I look forward to hearing from each and every one of you

 

Feeling burned out is never easy to handle, I think everyone who has a hobby has probably felt it at one time or another.
If you feel you can keep rescuing then do it! There's so many pets out there that need help and as a rescuer myself I know how hard it can be to loose an animal you worked so hard to save.

If I didn't have pets, I would be depressed too!
I have 9 parrots, most of which were rescues, 1 little sparrow that has one wing, nearly a dozen snakes, a bearded dragon, close to 50 nano fish, I'll spare you the species.

I spend most of my day taking care of them but as much of my time as it takes I still love them all so much.

Hope this helps

 

Its a great thing to have purpose in life. For me the meaning of life is to give life meaning. If you have such a purpose don't throw it away. It will sustain you.

But to be happy you have to take responsibility and manage your life so that you can cope. Now I don't know what you're experiencing but hope you can work through it rather than coming to a stop.

Life is an uphill struggle and you're bound to trip up on the way but you want to avoid any serious falls if you can see them coming.

Happiness is a blessing, don't take it for granted and don't turn it down.

 

I think the time of year tends to bring an added feeling of burn out or just feeling yuck.

Almost at the end of 2022, which like the previous 2 years, have been somewhat overloaded with extra baggage (pandemic, cost of living etc) it can be alot for someone who enjoys 100% good health.

The proverbial "same poo, different day" type of thing. Without doubt we have all experienced that feeling of waking up in the morning and wondering "oh here we go again".

The holiday season almost always makes you more reflective about where you are in life, what has happened in the last 12 months and what is to come in the next 12 months

Thinking positively always helps but it isn't as easy as people think when faced with health woes or financial woes....the anxiety levels often increase despite all attempts to stop them

Closing the door to 2022 and opening it for 2023 with renewed hope and positivity is easier said than done but done it must be.

Take the next couple of weeks to rest up, recharge the batteries and be around those you care about (and who care about you)...keep smiling and be ready to attack 2023 and beat it into submission

(Cos after the last 3 years, 2023 will be hard pressed to be any worse or any harder to handle )

 

If you want more time to yourself you should take it.

I also keep a lot of pets and therefore rarely have any vacations. Last one was in the year 2000, and I paid two pet sitters over $500 to take care of my pets (24 parrots, 3 dogs, several aquariums). Almost 20 yrs ago the local paper did a story on me and then local people thought I was an animal rescue (I was NOT) and started dropping parrots off at my doorstep! I eventually had to turn people away as I could not properly care for any more pets. I had a second home I felt I could never enjoy so we bought a cargo van so we could take them all with us. But now I’ve got my own business and work 7 days a week, usually 12 hours a day with a couple hours break here and there (thank goodness, gives me time to clean bird cages and pick up poop in my yard). I’ve had 3 days (today is the last of those 3 days) in which I’ve had all to myself. How NICE!!

So you do what you need to do in order to keep things going well for yourself. Exactly what your solution will be, that will be yours to decide.

Finding homes for some of your pets could be a good idea, for sure. Figure out which ones are taking most of your time and work to rehome them.

You could reach out to friends and family to see if anyone is willing to give you a hand caring for your pets. You could always hire a pet sitter and take a couple of weeks off the pet care chores. Good pet sitters are not cheap though.

If you find yourself with too much spare time, then perhaps you can get your “pet fix” by doing some pet sitting, getting a part time job at a pet store, volunteer at a pet shelter or a pet rescue. You may be able to turn some of your pets over to that rescue and be able to help place them into new homes.

I think you can work with some rescues on Petfinder.com and post your pets to be rehomed through one of those rescues. I go out there from time to time to see if there are any fish near me that need to be rehomed. I’d take a betta or two if I saw them posted.

Does any of this sound doable? Only you will have the solution. I hope some of this helps.

 

local people thought I was an animal rescue (I was NOT) and started dropping parrots off at my doorstep!

Woah...I've had that happen! Just yesterday some stranger dropped off a big tank on my porch. I don't have space for it, so for now I sleeping on my bed beside tanks and cages.

So you do what you need to do in order to keep things going well for yourself. Exactly what your solution will be, that will be yours to decide.

Finding homes for some of your pets could be a good idea, for sure. Figure out which ones are taking most of your time and work to rehome them.

That's a great idea. I don't know who's taking up the most time. Well, the cats for sure, but they're family pets.

The bettas are a lot of work, having 15 of them. Curmudgeonly, my 5-year-old gerbil, is a good boy and doesn't take up barely any time. My gerbil girls, not terribly much, hamsters neither. The beetles just chill, so does the crab. I suppose the critters taking up most of my time are the goldfish and bettas. I really bit off more than I could chew when it came to the goldfish and bettas. But I've been doing this for 11 years. The most bettas I had at once was 28. I've felt burnt out before, but now being in 2 schools?

You could reach out to friends and family to see if anyone is willing to give you a hand caring for your pets.

I wish I could...I haven't had face-to-face friends in over 6 years, and most of my family is trash. I have no close family either, on the other side of my country. I occasionally pet sit my neighbor's old black lab. I can't afford a pet sitter though...

If you find yourself with too much spare time, then perhaps you can get your “pet fix” by doing some pet sitting, getting a part time job at a pet store, volunteer at a pet shelter or a pet rescue. You may be able to turn some of your pets over to that rescue and be able to help place them into new homes.

I've wanted to volunteer at my local humane society for many years, but I couldn't until I was 16. Then COVID hit, now I'm 19...

I think you can work with some rescues on Petfinder.com and post your pets to be rehomed through one of those rescues. I go out there from time to time to see if there are any fish near me that need to be rehomed. I’d take a betta or two if I saw them posted.

Wow, really? I didn't know I could do that! That's a great idea, thanks.


zERostArk07 , Redshark1 , BettaBeThere , Aqua67 - you are all amazing! Thank you

 

Burn out is your mind telling you that you are under stress and need to back off a bit.

it's okay. IT IS NOT FAILURE. It is just your body and mind's way of letting you know there's an issue before there's a crisis.

It's healthy that you recognize the burn out, so go you! I mean that sincerely. many ppl ignore bio-feedback and go full crisis mode & 'crash' because they never hit pause.

Re-access what you can do. It's okay to pull back the reigns a bit.

I had 15 tanks at 1 point - half were bettas.I got down to 8 and now back up to 9. But after the holiday, I am taking 2 more down. ( my water chnages on average take 4.5 hours a week, if deep clean 6)

A hobby should not feel like a job. It's great you rescue & have passion for the hobby, but it's also okay to stop until you feel it's not too much effort.

I have OCD , so I know I'd be a dog hoarder if my HOA did not limit me to 2 dogs, lol

be honest with yourself, make goals and be fluid about timelines so you don't feel more stressed as you work this this issue.

Best of luck! However it turns out, the hardest part was seeing that you needed to make a change, how you do that change will actually be easier now that you see it.

 

Burn out is your mind telling you that you are under stress and need to back off a bit.

it's okay. IT IS NOT FAILURE. It is just your body and mind's way of letting you know there's an issue before there's a crisis.

It's healthy that you recognize the burn out, so go you! I mean that sincerely. many ppl ignore bio-feedback and go full crisis mode & 'crash' because they never hit pause.

Re-access what you can do. It's okay to pull back the reigns a bit.

I had 15 tanks at 1 point - half were bettas.I got down to 8 and now back up to 9. But after the holiday, I am taking 2 more down. ( my water chnages on average take 4.5 hours a week, if deep clean 6)

A hobby should not feel like a job. It's great you rescue & have passion for the hobby, but it's also okay to stop until you feel it's not too much effort.

I have OCD , so I know I'd be a dog hoarder if my HOA did not limit me to 2 dogs, lol

be honest with yourself, make goals and be fluid about timelines so you don't feel more stressed as you work this this issue.

Best of luck! However it turns out, the hardest part was seeing that you needed to make a change, how you do that change will actually be easier now that you see it.

Thank you friend! Amazing answer. I appreciate it.

I have obsessive compulsive tendencies thanks to genetics (could have full-out OCD but haven't been diagnosed yet.) I have more compulsions, less obsession (for example, I have to edit my posts here on Fishlore at least 3 times to make sure it's evenly written - sometimes I "have" to type a letter, then untype again and again and again until it feels right. Sometimes that takes over 30 seconds. So yeah, I feel you.

But I can't thank you enough for your response. I think you're right; people tend to ignore what the body says until it's too late. My Ama (grandma in chinese) passed away 4 years ago because of stress-related cancer. She worked too hard. My dad does too. I already have compulsions from my Ama - I don't want to suffer like her either.

I think I'll take everyone's comments to heart. I'd actually started rehoming my critters, getting rid of enclosures as well as upgrading them. I've dreamed of times where I just have simple pets; Kiwi the toad, Curmudgeonly the 5yo gerbil, the darkling beetles, mealworms, Cannoli the dwarf hamster, and my favorite fish, a thai oranda. It sounds so simple, yet so far. I've always kept a myriad of critters. I never see myself as keeping none, but I can at least decrease the amount I take care of.

Thanks again for your response(s)

 

Glad it helped!

We can be the hardest critics of ourselves.

alcoholism runs in my family and that seems to have OCD partner with it in families as clusters. There's a lot of good resources on you tube, if you need to look into that subject further. I can only go by what works for me. OCD never really goes away ( it's a stress response after all, a behavior crutch ) but it can be managed.



recognize when it triggers
recognize feelings and why
establish if it's a valid emotional response, a true inner want/need or a stress response


behavior issues are hard to kick because our issues are 'safe patterns' so we repeat them over and over... even if we know the outcome can be bad, it has a predictable end so 'safe'

sorry to be long winded. imo - pulling back the 'why' makes the response to mange the 'how' easier.




Best wishes!