Trade Offs In Relationships

ok, I know I’m not the only one. (If so, I’m a fool).
How many of you in relationships have to trade to get something you want?
Example: neighbor abuses dog. I can’t stand it anymore. I take dog. Bathe, brush, feed, water, then they come get dog. I tell them since they don’t like him, let me keep. They say fine. Hubby says “But what do I get out of it?”. After a long negotiation, he gets a new Harley, I get a new fur ball. Btw, if your SO says buy me a mc and I’ll be happy and never ask for another thing, don’t fall for it. A mc is a money pit. Big time.
So, this is the kind of guy I’m up against. I need to take this giant danio back to LFS. How do I get him to agree without spending money? And before you say what’s in your minds, we don’t go there anymore and I’ve had him for forty two years.

Please share your trade offs so I know I’m not alone.

 

So you can't trade him in for 2 half his age? Lol.

 

So you can't trade him in for 2 half his age? Lol.

Yup! That's the trade I'd be making!

 

So you can't trade him in for 2 half his age? Lol.

He’s my lost puppy. What would I do without someone who needs me even though I haven’t got much to offer?
One half...stop it! Putting evil thoughts in my head! Lol

 

He’s my lost puppy. What would I do without someone who needs me even though I haven’t got much to offer?
One half...stop it! Putting evil thoughts in my head! Lol

Haven't got much to offer? Poppycock! (Stronger words are frowned upon on this forum :yuck Those that think that way usually have the most to offer. You save lives...Doesn't matter if it's fish, dogs, or in your case, humans. You save lives!

 

Haven't got much to offer? Poppycock! (Stronger words are frowned upon on this forum :yuck Those that think that way usually have the most to offer. You save lives...Doesn't matter if it's fish, dogs, or in your case, humans. You save lives!

Don’t be making me cry now!

 

Sorry, can’t help you there. I haven’t done trade-offs since I discovered “online-dating”.

 

Trade? You mean all these years I could have made a trade, she never told me that.

 

with my girlfriend.. She doesn't let me in a fish store alone. I always end up buying a fish or 10. So every once in awhile I bribe her with chocolate.. Yes chocolate. For some reason I get fool control of her mind when I use that word then I get to buy a fish.

 

Sporting event tickets, or movie nights normally work.
Edit: oh wait those are money... Well, movie night isn't always, just rewatch some favorites.

 

Trading chores sometimes works if you're not looking to spend money. Or if there is something they have been wanting to do and you've not quite agreed to the idea up to this point...

 

Trade? You mean all these years I could have made a trade, she never told me that.

Boy is she lucky! Lol

 

with my girlfriend.. She doesn't let me in a fish store alone. I always end up buying a fish or 10. So every once in awhile I bribe her with chocolate.. Yes chocolate. For some reason I get fool control of her mind when I use that word then I get to buy a fish.

Did you say chocolate?

 

Did you say chocolate?

yep

 

Truth is, I'm the lucky one, she saved me when I was in a very dark place in my life.

 

yep

What you need? Lol

 

I'm not in a LOVE relationship but a family relation ship with my parents.
"Can I have another betta?"
"no..."
" Its better then doing drugs"
*Long thinking*
*A new 10 gallon tank appears in the corner of my room"
I don't know if that's a proper trade off but its deal to my parents.

 

Same CanadianFishFan
My mom is cool with my animals, for the most part. But I have to constantly use fishkeeping as a reminder that I could be obsessed with other things that my dad would not approve of. He gets a good daughter, I get some endlers lol

 

My betta boyfriends (2 halfmoons) get frozen brine shrimp when they jump for pellets

 

I'm not in a LOVE relationship but a family relation ship with my parents.
"Can I have another betta?"
"no..."
" Its better then doing drugs"
*Long thinking*
*A new 10 gallon tank appears in the corner of my room"
I don't know if that's a proper trade off but its deal to my parents.

I gotta try that one...

 

I'm not in a LOVE relationship but a family relation ship with my parents.
"Can I have another betta?"
"no..."
" Its better then doing drugs"
*Long thinking*
*A new 10 gallon tank appears in the corner of my room"
I don't know if that's a proper trade off but its deal to my parents.

Never worked with my parents. They don't really like fish, so I'm always the one who is doing everything.

 

I'm not in a LOVE relationship but a family relation ship with my parents.
"Can I have another betta?"
"no..."
" Its better then doing drugs"
*Long thinking*
*A new 10 gallon tank appears in the corner of my room"
I don't know if that's a proper trade off but its deal to my parents.

Trade ???? That's blackmail hahaha.
But if it works.

 

I don't know how to get out of it without letting him spend money. Last night he was all "So...what's my budget for a new shiny?" (aka, rifle). Me"...you would know better than I would, but you have my permission to get something." (aka, please don't ask about the new 20 gallon long hiding in the laundry room when you discover it >_>)

 

I don't know how to get out of it without letting him spend money. Last night he was all "So...what's my budget for a new shiny?" (aka, rifle). Me"...you would know better than I would, but you have my permission to get something." (aka, please don't ask about the new 20 gallon long hiding in the laundry room when you discover it >_>)

Mine likes to brag to his buds about new toys. When I got this new 20 long he’s like ANOTHER aquarium?!? I said ANOTHER gun?!? His turn to be quiet. I think he’s still trying to think of a good comeback. Lol

 

The key is to get your wife/husband into your hobby

That's what I managed to do this time around. Suddenly it's "our" aquarium and "our" shrimp tank. It's perfect!

 

I’ve always involved my husband in my hobbies. Got him to learn to make porcelain dolls so he’s kinda easy. Things appear in my fish tank, new plant, fish etc and he notices. He’s getting some pricey teeth implants soon so I’m thinking a bigger tank maybe in my future .

 

I was always a package deal. I came with kids (from a previous marriage)and dogs. Originally I got into fish for my kids... yeah. Here’s where the “deal” comes in.

I wanted a snake, have since I was a kid. He said no way. Fast forward some years and now we have 2 dogs, 3 cats, 6 fish tanks, 2 Tortoises, a Pac-Man frog, a leopard gecko and a bearded dragon. But the cats were “for him” since I have so many pets, even though the cats love me more.

Also I commandeered half the living room as my “fish/pet room” because mom will not be shuffled off to the garage. My hubby adores me and I’m am lucky to have him.

My hubby loves video games like I love animals so we play together and he is happy. He also loves DnD so we play that regularly with friends. I even tried DMing so he could actually play instead of having to DM all the time. Point is, the trade doesn’t always have to be monetary. But showing interest and making room for both person’s passions is key.

 

I won't trade get into trades with my wife if I don't agree I doesn't happen and the same goes when she doesn't agree. But we will try to convince each other to agree what the other wants but I'm bettet at it then her that's why 8 have a 110g not a 30g.