The really bad joke thread!

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff' started by Akari_32, Dec 11, 2012.

  1. Akari_32Fishlore LegendMember

    Whats not to love about horribly punny jokes?? One of my personal favorites:

    "I moustache you a question, but I'll shave it for later."


  2. AquaristFishlore LegendMember

    Why was Santa Clause depressed?

    Because of his ELFishness.


  3. AlexAlexWell Known MemberMember


    This thread ROCKS!

  4. flynruffValued MemberMember

    Why was the sand wet?
    Because the seaweed.
  5. AlexAlexWell Known MemberMember

    Why isn't Winnie The Pooh ever lonely?

    Because he always has his HONEY with him! :;laughing

    (I made this one up when I was a teenager).
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2012
  6. Akari_32Fishlore LegendMember

    Ewwwwww LOL
  7. Rejectedbread87Valued MemberMember

    What do you call cheese that's not yours?

    Nacho cheese!
  8. ZeeZWell Known MemberMember

  9. Akari_32Fishlore LegendMember

    You are now officially my favorite person ever!!!

    :;laughing :;laughing :;laughing :;laughing :;laughing :;laughing
  10. AquaristFishlore LegendMember

    For all of the above:


  11. Makena95'GTWell Known MemberMember

  12. MmbrownWell Known MemberMember

    What did the acorn say when he grew up?
  13. oscarsbudWell Known MemberMember

  14. AlanGreeneWell Known MemberMember


    Attached Files:

  15. Quinn_Lamb98Well Known MemberMember

    aren't plecos so scute.

    i do not get the sandand seaweed one. and what is wrong with Twilight?
  16. AlexAlexWell Known MemberMember

    The sand is wet because the "sea" "wee'd" (hint: bathroom) on it or in it. :)
  17. sirdarksolFishlore LegendMember

    Vampires don't sparkle.

    And, for my favorite puntacular joke:
  18. AlanGreeneWell Known MemberMember

    Noah started building several arks for various parts of animal kingdom. One was a split level job for all the fish – a multi-storey carp ark

    Why are fish so smart?…They are always in schools

    Two goldfish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says “You drive, I’ll man the guns!”

    Oh cod, I can’t take any more of these fish puns, I’m outta this plaice!
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 11, 2012
  19. ryanrModeratorModerator Member

    I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

    Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

    The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.

    Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.

    Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.

    My new theory on inertia doesn't seem to be gaining momentum.

    Ok, that's enough
  20. sirdarksolFishlore LegendMember

    What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

    Two men walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second man says "That sounds good. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

    A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs help with his luggage. The photon responds "no, I'm traveling light."

    Oxygen and magnesium together? OMg

    Argon walks into a bar. The bartender says "Get the heck out of here." Argon doesn't react.

    Neutron has had a fun night at the bar. He wants to pay his tab. Bartender says, "For you, no charge."

    Does anyone else think these chemistry jokes are getting a bit boron?

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