The fish was THIS big!

bhcaaron
  • #1
Ok... story telling time.

Tell me any fish story you know. Anything at all (keep it nice and clean, people!). Stories, jokes, experiences, anything goes.

I'll start with a lame one:

What did the fish say when it hit the wall?




DAM!
 
Tom
  • #2
Who put this wall here?
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #3
No... ummm... the answer WAS dam!



Here is a small poem I never forgot. I can't remember the author though.

It is called


FISH

Oh wet pet.

(shortest poem I've ever seen)
 
Tom
  • #4
I still like my answer better. lol
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #5
haha... ok, I'll let you have yours then!
 
Tom
  • #6
purple_phoenix
  • #7
What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh!


Yeah... I should've warned you I'm not very good with jokes
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #8
What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh!


Yeah... I should've warned you I'm not very good with jokes

Yep, you're right. You should have warned us lol jk. Its ok... My sister still laughs at:

Two peanuts walk into a bar and one was a salted!

And she's older than I am!
 
armadillo
  • #9
ha ha ha ha haaaa! Aaron, I am literally falling off my chair laughing!

Here is a small poem I never forgot. I can't remember the author though.

It is called


FISH

Oh wet pet.

(shortest poem I've ever seen)
 
armadillo
  • #10
Oh gaaaawd I love fish jokes!!!!!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh!


Yeah... I should've warned you I'm not very good with jokes
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #11
ha ha ha ha haaaa! Aaron, I am literally falling off my chair laughing!

But its true though! It was in my 6th grade English/Lit book under poetry.
 
purple_phoenix
  • #12
That peanut joke's good, though!

I don't know how they figure 'Oh wet pet' to be a poem :S
Still - I heard the shortest poem ever was called 'Fleas', and it went:

Adam 'ad 'em
 
purple_phoenix
  • #13
Oh yeah... I have another fish joke (You've been warned!)


Why is it so easy to weigh fish?

- They have their own scales!
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #14
Would somebody PLEASE euthanise Phoenix's sense of humor! lol jk
 
Tom
  • #15
Would somebody PLEASE euthanise Phoenix's sense of humor! lol jk

Actually, the last one was pretty good(for them at least). lol
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #16
For them? Who's them? I haven't met Them or They yet. So many people have been luckier than me I guess.
 
Tom
  • #17
I don't know if p.p. is a male or female and I didn't want to offend him/her.
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #18
Hence my using only the screenname lol
 
Tom
  • #19
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #20
hahaha... L-A-A-Z-Y!
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #22
I'm going to post a substrate thread in the next ten or fifteen minutes. Look it up if you know anything about it.
 
Tom
  • #23
I'm going to post a substrate thread in the next ten or fifteen minutes. Look it up if you know anything about it.

I will if I feel like it. lol Where is it going to be?
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #24
Saltwater miscellaneous
"Substrate questions"
 
Tom
  • #25
Don't know nothing about Saltwater subtrate.
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #26
Hahahaha... now my question would be, does it exist? lol
 
purple_phoenix
  • #27
Someone's been talking about me while I was away....


Apologies for never introducing myself.

Hello. I'm Laura. I'm female.
You may call me purple phoenix if you really must, but I'd rather not be called PP. It sounds like when a little kid needs the loo

And I haven't got a clue about Saltwater substrate, so sorry about that too.
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #28
I think I just woke up the house with the PP comment ahahahahah ROTFL
 
purple_phoenix
  • #29
Haha... calm down!

It wasn't that funny....
 
Tom
  • #30
Any other jokes, etc.?
Tom
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #31
Its not a fish one though:

A man walking on a beach stumbles on a lamp and a Genie pups up. The Genie tells the man he is not a regular Genie. What ever he wishes for, his mother-in-law will receive twice as many and twice as much. The disgruntled man decides on his first wish and wishes for a million dollars. Poof he has a million dollars and bam! his mother-in-law receives two million. The man, further upset, decides he wants a mansion. Poof! he gets a gorgeous mansion and bam! his mother-in-law gets two, twice as big. Now the man is starting to loose it. He keeps saying to himself, "Think! Think!" Finally he says, "I got it! Genie... beat me HALF to death!"


=b (I don't know how to spell genie lol)
 
purple_phoenix
  • #32
That's mad... and mean... but still funny!


I stole this one off a website

Little TI'm was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "Whatcha doing, Tim?"
"My goldfish died," replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. "And I've just buried him."

The neighbour was concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

TI'm patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your cat."
 
capekate
  • #33
Oh yeah... I have another fish joke (You've been warned!)


Why is it so easy to weigh fish?

- They have their own scales!

 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #34
"That's because he's inside your cat."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

GULP OF AIR

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
 
purple_phoenix
  • #35
LOL

Note how you laugh at a joke I took off the net, and not at my own =P
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #36
OMG! I need a Twix right now lol.... ummm.... ummmm.... that wasn't me! It looks like me, but,... um that was my twin brother... =D
 
purple_phoenix
  • #37
How... convincing!

You go eat your twix... and I'll just sit here... and cry... alone....

And maybe make up some more jokes.
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #38
hahahahahaha... I try! I was offered an Oscar before. I was so surprised. I wanted to do the "You like me! You really like me!" ordeal. Then I realized they were talking about fish!
 
purple_phoenix
  • #39
Aww
So did you take the oscar? Then you could still have gone through the ' "You like me! You really like me!" ordeal' and had a free fish.

Not that a free fish would have compensated for the embarrassment you could've caused yourself....
 
bhcaaron
  • Thread Starter
  • #40
Ummm... this thread is called "The fish was THIS big!". You know... big fish story... lies.... I just made that up!

HA HA! =b right back at ya! Woot Woot! One point for Aaron ahahahahahahaha
 

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