Mental health

Desi

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Hey everyone! So this is my first post and I wasn’t sure were to post this. I’ve been struggling with mental health issues all my life. I have depression and a severe anxiety disorder. In this time of unknowing with the virus and social distancing, I’ve been taking comfort in my fish keeping hobby. Does any one else struggle with similar things? If so how do you cope with it?
 
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Bloodfeather

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Desi said:
Hey everyone! So this is my first post and I wasn’t sure were to post this. I’ve been struggling with mental health issues all my life. I have depression and a severe anxiety disorder. In this time of unknowing with the virus and social distancing, I’ve been taking comfort in my fish keeping hobby. Does any one else struggle with similar things? If so how do you cope with it?
I have depression and severe anxiety too, and I am ADHD so I struggle with a lot of stuff.

It's the same for me as it is for you, I find solace in my fishkeeping. It gives me a purpose, a reason to get up in the morning. Little lives that I have to care for :p Knowing that I am doing a good job, and helping these little fish to live their best lives, it gives me validation.

I sadly can't give you many tips, as I struggle a lot myself. I hope you're doing ok! :)
 

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I'm not suffering from any anxiety because of the current issues, but I have a close family member who is. Mine are completely different. For me it's new situations, especially if I'm alone. I'm okay in them with a family member or someone else I trust, but alone I've sometimes become physically sick just from dreading it. So actually I guess I'm lucky. I'm mostly staying home, and staying in my comfortable routine.
 

MaximumRide14

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I'd prefer to talk in PM, so I'll watch this thread instead and listen to everyone's advice.
 

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I have diagnosed anxiety (specifically social anxiety) that brings on depression. I escape it by delving into my studies and my hobbies. I love learning. I research research research my fish things, and I recently got into planting tomatoes and strawberries, and I bought a few houseplants. And I have college.

Lately it’s been much harder. I’m struggling with physical manifestations of my anxiety, mainly digestive issues. My stomach hurts 24/7 and eating makes me feel nauseous. This happened once before to me, and I lost a lot of weight before it magically went away. I’m actually headed to the doc’s tomorrow to check on it because it’s been 3 months. It lines up with COVID, though, so I’m sure it’s anxiety-induced. This is why I’ve added the plants, haha, an extra hobby to distract myself with.

Lately I’ve also had to turn off my social media and the news and hide away in fishlore and video games. It’s been a lot harder recently and I’m honestly wishing I had a therapist right now. I’ve never needed one before, I’ve always managed myself, but this is much worse.

Long story short, lots of distractions.
 

flyinGourami

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I find peace in animal keeping as well as plants... Other people are great but sometimes its much easier for them to get mad at you when you let them down. Sometimes communicating with other people is hard, whether its online or face to face.

I don't want to act a victim since there are and always will be others who are suffering much more. I hope people are doing okay and I really do wish you can one day stop dealing with it... I'm not even diagnosed in any way. Sometimes it feels like I'm sick and I'm about to explode and can't handle it. Other days I'm totally fine and all insults bounce off; like why do I care. Maybe its a part of growing up, but even just slightly observing people I think all of us deal with a lot more than some people realize. This situation does not scare me in the slightest. Well scare me myself, once I imagined something like this but right now it really isn't as scary. Personally, and some may find it silly, dealing with people regularly is a lot harder. You never know when they are whispering about you, or if they're lying, and you always seem to have to be prepared for when they might leave you.
Anyway, I wish you will continue the hobby or anything to make you feel better. Art and animals have always been amazing to me.
 

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I don’t have any diagnosed anxiety related disorders but like everyone I have to deal with the stresses that life throws up. I’m an introvert which is probably not helpful in times of heightened stress where being able to connect with others is beneficial. Most of my life I’ve dealt with this by focusing on the small things that bring me pleasure such as hobbies like fish keeping and gardening. Works for me but I do need to force myself to talk to people more. It’s not easy but helps when I do.

Btw I went to a mental health session a while back. The therapist stated her view that it is not healthy for some people to be watching the news broadcasts on a daily basis. 90% of the news is negative. She said that she only watches it herself once per week, which is enough to catch up on all major events. That might be particularly relevant at the present time. So maybe turn the TV off and do that water change. ;)
 

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I may be a touch bi polar but am not sure, I grew up playing organized sports(baseball) and it made me stoic for the most part but some days I kinda lose it and some days I do not, ever changing situations do not bother me at all and are manageable for me but the daily routine thing is very hard for me to deal with some days and I just wig out.
My dad has always told me all you can control is what is controllable and the only true thing you yourself can control is yourself.
I have no quiet area to de stress or unwind and I usually stay up late to get my peace....
All you can do is recognize when your about to have an episode and mentally walk away from it, being strong willed against yourself is hard but if you have found solice in fish keeping than I suggest you buy a bigger tank :) lol.
Keep you chin up and walk tall and do not let the world around you affect you or define you.
 

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Im sorry, this probably is not going to help, but i can try. Stick with me here for a second... i started fishkeeping not out of choice, but because i was forced into it. I suppose i technically had a choice, but it was either take in a goldfish or let it die. It had been living in a 15g tank at my school with 4 goldfosh tankmates, when 4 of them suddenly died "with no explicabble reason" (i could go into a long rant about how horrible condotions they were being kept in, but dont worry, i wont) and i was very upset. Furthermore, when he announced it to the class, a girl that i had considered my friend said "yay! Now we can make sushi!" And some more remarks like that. It was particularly upseting to me because 1. Im really bad at socialising, and it took me 3 years to be able to become friends with her friends, 2. I had considered her a friend since the age of 5, and 3. I only had 3 friends at that point, so one of them saying something like that really upset me. Soon after the entire class joined in, and the only person not laughing at their deaths was this 1 girl, who i now consider my best friend (and only friend). I was really upset, and was emailing my sister a lot during class, and she agreed to get a 28g tank for the golfish. Im really hoping now to get more fish, but thats the story of how i got my goldfish. Now, i may not find comfort solely in fishkeeping (it has been nonstop ilnesses and disieases and pest snails and i had to do a fosh in cycle... it was crazy) but i definietly understand it. I know quarantine is hard, and it has for sure taken its toll on my family. My soster has RA and it sure was hard trying to figure out how she was going to get her injections without having to go to a packed hospital. I have moderate to severe hearing loss, and it has caused me to jave depression, which for some reason created my OCD. I know OCD is commoly used as a joke, but its not something to be taken lightly imo. Sometimes it makes me feel like my head is splitting apart, and sometimes it makes me cry uncontrollably. Wierdly enough, i am draling with all this by doing sports. I love riding horses. (And to all you people out there who say horseback riding is not a sport, then i suggest ypu do 40 sit-stand per minute for 30 minutes. Cause thats what i gotta do to maintaon a trot) i love that feeling when im transitioning from canter to gallop, and the gait is unsure. Idk if u have anything like this, but for me, that one moment lets me recharge. Im sorry, wish i was more help...
 

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I am an old man now, and have experienced stuff in life. I am not an expert in anyway, all I know is that life can get to ya if you let it. I once watched a movie along time ago and one character stated, "Don't sweat the small stuff." The second character in the movie asked, "What is the small stuff." The answer was, "All of it."

I was in high school during the Vietnam War, and every night on the news the body count was reported on how many young American boys lost their lives. That was very depressing. They would show flag draped coffins arriving at Airports. In those days we where drafted into the military, and if drafted then sent to Vietnam a person had to go. Unless that person moved to Canada, or was a very important person's son. Fortunately by the time I was old enough for the draft, the Vietnam war was over. This time period was a very dramatic here in America. Protests against the war, etc.

But we only had a TV, that was it, no computer, no cell phone, no internet, no social media, etc. The TV only got three channels. So today, I can see how so many young people can become stressed out with all this. You have instant communications, the entire world at your finger tips. That is the good, the bad, and the ugly of it all.

If all that wasn't bad enough, now the Covid-19 virus. This is ruff for many young people that still have their hold lives ahead of them. You have all this stuff ringing in your ears, constantly creating a drum beat in your brain. It is enough to take a person to the breaking point.

But don't let it, find an outlet, run outside and scream at the moon. Let it out, don't keep it bottled up inside, let it go. Consider how important you are, there is no one like you in the entire universe.

Set down and start writing a book about your feelings, who cares if no one ever reads it, that's not the point. Just get it out in front of you, and then say there it is out of me and on the computer, or paper whatever. You might be surprised.
Walk out at night and stare at the stars, and think what a wonderful universe we live in. Here I am world, I care about myself, I care about my future, I am here.
 
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Desi

Desi

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Bloodfeather said:
I have depression and severe anxiety too, and I am ADHD so I struggle with a lot of stuff.

It's the same for me as it is for you, I find solace in my fishkeeping. It gives me a purpose, a reason to get up in the morning. Little lives that I have to care for :p Knowing that I am doing a good job, and helping these little fish to live their best lives, it gives me validation.

I sadly can't give you many tips, as I struggle a lot myself. I hope you're doing ok! :)
Thank you so much for sharing. It helps to know that I’m not alone:)

UnknownUser said:
I have diagnosed anxiety (specifically social anxiety) that brings on depression. I escape it by delving into my studies and my hobbies. I love learning. I research research research my fish things, and I recently got into planting tomatoes and strawberries, and I bought a few houseplants. And I have college.

Lately it’s been much harder. I’m struggling with physical manifestations of my anxiety, mainly digestive issues. My stomach hurts 24/7 and eating makes me feel nauseous. This happened once before to me, and I lost a lot of weight before it magically went away. I’m actually headed to the doc’s tomorrow to check on it because it’s been 3 months. It lines up with COVID, though, so I’m sure it’s anxiety-induced. This is why I’ve added the plants, haha, an extra hobby to distract myself with.

Lately I’ve also had to turn off my social media and the news and hide away in fishlore and video games. It’s been a lot harder recently and I’m honestly wishing I had a therapist right now. I’ve never needed one before, I’ve always managed myself, but this is much worse.

Long story short, lots of distractions.
Thank you so much for sharing! Knowing that we’re not alone in the mental health side of things really helps. I hope things look up for you. I’ve been fortunate enough to have a good therapist, but right now I can’t see her due to the virus. :(

Greenfungaloo said:
Im sorry, this probably is not going to help, but i can try. Stick with me here for a second... i started fishkeeping not out of choice, but because i was forced into it. I suppose i technically had a choice, but it was either take in a goldfish or let it die. It had been living in a 15g tank at my school with 4 goldfosh tankmates, when 4 of them suddenly died "with no explicabble reason" (i could go into a long rant about how horrible condotions they were being kept in, but dont worry, i wont) and i was very upset. Furthermore, when he announced it to the class, a girl that i had considered my friend said "yay! Now we can make sushi!" And some more remarks like that. It was particularly upseting to me because 1. Im really bad at socialising, and it took me 3 years to be able to become friends with her friends, 2. I had considered her a friend since the age of 5, and 3. I only had 3 friends at that point, so one of them saying something like that really upset me. Soon after the entire class joined in, and the only person not laughing at their deaths was this 1 girl, who i now consider my best friend (and only friend). I was really upset, and was emailing my sister a lot during class, and she agreed to get a 28g tank for the golfish. Im really hoping now to get more fish, but thats the story of how i got my goldfish. Now, i may not find comfort solely in fishkeeping (it has been nonstop ilnesses and disieases and pest snails and i had to do a fosh in cycle... it was crazy) but i definietly understand it. I know quarantine is hard, and it has for sure taken its toll on my family. My soster has RA and it sure was hard trying to figure out how she was going to get her injections without having to go to a packed hospital. I have moderate to severe hearing loss, and it has caused me to jave depression, which for some reason created my OCD. I know OCD is commoly used as a joke, but its not something to be taken lightly imo. Sometimes it makes me feel like my head is splitting apart, and sometimes it makes me cry uncontrollably. Wierdly enough, i am draling with all this by doing sports. I love riding horses. (And to all you people out there who say horseback riding is not a sport, then i suggest ypu do 40 sit-stand per minute for 30 minutes. Cause thats what i gotta do to maintaon a trot) i love that feeling when im transitioning from canter to gallop, and the gait is unsure. Idk if u have anything like this, but for me, that one moment lets me recharge. Im sorry, wish i was more help...
Thank you! No that actually is a lot of help, like I told others just knowing there’s others out there dealing with some of the same things is helpful in its self.

Utar said:
I am an old man now, and have experienced stuff in life. I am not an expert in anyway, all I know is that life can get to ya if you let it. I once watched a movie along time ago and one character stated, "Don't sweat the small stuff." The second character in the movie asked, "What is the small stuff." The answer was, "All of it."

I was in high school during the Vietnam War, and every night on the news the body count was reported on how many young American boys lost their lives. That was very depressing. They would show flag draped coffins arriving at Airports. In those days we where drafted into the military, and if drafted then sent to Vietnam a person had to go. Unless that person moved to Canada, or was a very important person's son. Fortunately by the time I was old enough for the draft, the Vietnam war was over. This time period was a very dramatic here in America. Protests against the war, etc.

But we only had a TV, that was it, no computer, no cell phone, no internet, no social media, etc. The TV only got three channels. So today, I can see how so many young people can become stressed out with all this. You have instant communications, the entire world at your finger tips. That is the good, the bad, and the ugly of it all.

If all that wasn't bad enough, now the Covid-19 virus. This is ruff for many young people that still have their hold lives ahead of them. You have all this stuff ringing in your ears, constantly creating a drum beat in your brain. It is enough to take a person to the breaking point.

But don't let it, find an outlet, run outside and scream at the moon. Let it out, don't keep it bottled up inside, let it go. Consider how important you are, there is no one like you in the entire universe.

Set down and start writing a book about your feelings, who cares if no one ever reads it, that's not the point. Just get it out in front of you, and then say there it is out of me and on the computer, or paper whatever. You might be surprised.
Walk out at night and stare at the stars, and think what a wonderful universe we live in. Here I am world, I care about myself, I care about my future, I am here.
Thank you, that actually made my night lol. Hope you yourself are doing good and thank you for the kind words:)
 

erinw347

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I have been diagnosed with severe depression, general anxiety disorder, ADHD, and possibly bipolar type 2. I also use my fish keeping to help cope with it all. I have been dealing with it all since I was 11.
I also have moderate exercise induced asthma that popped up a year or two ago and that’s really hard to deal with because I used to be a total athlete.
Luckily the pandemic itself hasn’t been horrible for my mental health, it was the online school. Now that that’s over though, it’s not as bad. It’s been the hardest to me to hear about the George Floyd thing.
So yes, I understand. It’s been really difficult, but taking care of other things helps me take care of myself. It’s why I also have 3 cats and a million house plants lol.
 

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I have never been diagnosed with any mental health conditions. But I have mood and stress battles and I find that my fish help. Fiddling with the tanks. Re-scaping. Water change. Reading.

I also find that exercise helps.
 

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All - Get more sleep! Not a cure-all, but always helps. :) Many hugs & prayers for all.

Lots of good advice here.
 

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I think many people with depression and anxiety find comfort in all sorts of animals. I have struggled with autism, anxiety, depression, and addiction my intire life. I find fish particularly relaxing and gain comfort knowing the life I provide for them is as near perfect as possible, and even a wild fish doesn't have it as good as my guys! They are a great distraction from all the terrible things in the world. I'm always imagining them happily conversing with each other about what kind of frozen food they will get or what new plant they have to hide in.

That being said my post wouldn't be compete without mentioning my rat, Fred. I have had him for two years and he is my support animal. He goes everywhere with me and provides a level of love and companionship that fish simply cant provide, being aquatic and such.

The moral of the story? Animals have saved my life time and time again. If only there was some way I could repay them!
 

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Daniodude

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EmbersToAshes said:
I think many people with depression and anxiety find comfort in all sorts of animals. I have struggled with autism, anxiety, depression, and addiction my intire life. I find fish particularly relaxing and gain comfort knowing the life I provide for them is as near perfect as possible, and even a wild fish doesn't have it as good as my guys! They are a great distraction from all the terrible things in the world. I'm always imagining them happily conversing with each other about what kind of frozen food they will get or what new plant they have to hide in.

That being said my post wouldn't be compete without mentioning my rat, Fred. I have had him for two years and he is my support animal. He goes everywhere with me and provides a level of love and companionship that fish simply cant provide, being aquatic and such.

The moral of the story? Animals have saved my life time and time again. If only there was some way I could repay them!
That is the most wholesome thing ever.
 

Greenfungaloo

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erinw347 said:
I have been diagnosed with severe depression, general anxiety disorder, ADHD, and possibly bipolar type 2. I also use my fish keeping to help cope with it all. I have been dealing with it all since I was 11.
I also have moderate exercise induced asthma that popped up a year or two ago and that’s really hard to deal with because I used to be a total athlete.
Luckily the pandemic itself hasn’t been horrible for my mental health, it was the online school. Now that that’s over though, it’s not as bad. It’s been the hardest to me to hear about the George Floyd thing.
So yes, I understand. It’s been really difficult, but taking care of other things helps me take care of myself. It’s why I also have 3 cats and a million house plants lol.
Sorry, i just noticed this and wanted to say something really quick about asthma. I have had it as long as i can remember (everyone in my family has ut except for my mom, she didnt) and i didnt always deal with it in the best way possible. Of course, doctors will probably dissagree with me on this, but i would say to spend more time doing what makes you unable to breathe. Okokok, sorry, lemme explain. Cats, for instance. When i was 8, i hung out with my friend for a sleepover. I knew she had two cats, but i figured that if i didnt touch them. I would be fine. I went to her place, never touched the cats, throughly washed my hands time and time again. But still, about an hour in, i found myself hiding in the bathroom to be using albuterol. The next day, hives appeared all iver my arms and body (my asthma and allergies go hand-in-hand) so, at that point, i already had a dog, and i had noticed my allergic reation to dogs had gone waaay down. Anyhow, i went to my friends place nore and more, and i was spending more and more time at her place, then i realized how annoying i was, aaaand i decided to rescue a stray kitten. Probably not the best life point. Anyhow, by now, i have spent a tooon of time around cats and my asthma is very rarely triggered by it. (Only when i try to wash them T-T) okay, if youre reading this, please stick with me a little longer. You said that you really love doing sports, right? And that triggers your asthma? Okay, here are.my 3 suggestions: 1. Breathe deep. Okay, this sounds so stupid, but really, it works. I have like 50 post-its around my room, and whenenver i see it, i breathe in till it feels like my lungs will burst. Sure, it hurts, but now i have far more strength in my lungs. 2. Just do it. If you like running, run. If you like swimming, swim. If you like basket ball, play basket ball. I love horseback riding. And it used to be incredibly painful to me. I mean, sure, it gets hard to breathe, but the more you do it, the better ypu get. 3. Dont use the albuterol. This is probably the most ridiculous sounding one, but, just please listen. For a long time, when i was about age 12, every night i got into bed, i would suddenly get really tight. Like, i couldnt even breathe tight. But then, one night, i realised i had used up my albuterol. And my sister and i share it, so i couldnt use hers. So, i had 2 options, breathe it out, or go to the hospital. It wasnt bad, so i chose to breathe it out. It was really hard, and i fell asleep at 2 am, and had trouble breathing all day. The next night,ni did the same thing. About 3 weeks later, my sister got the albuterol, but surprisingly enough, i didnt need it. My lungs were really strong from that short period of time! Okay... sorry, got kind of derailed there... anyhow... hopes that helps...
 

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Greenfungaloo said:
Sorry, i just noticed this and wanted to say something really quick about asthma. I have had it as long as i can remember (everyone in my family has ut except for my mom, she didnt) and i didnt always deal with it in the best way possible. Of course, doctors will probably dissagree with me on this, but i would say to spend more time doing what makes you unable to breathe. Okokok, sorry, lemme explain. Cats, for instance. When i was 8, i hung out with my friend for a sleepover. I knew she had two cats, but i figured that if i didnt touch them. I would be fine. I went to her place, never touched the cats, throughly washed my hands time and time again. But still, about an hour in, i found myself hiding in the bathroom to be using albuterol. The next day, hives appeared all iver my arms and body (my asthma and allergies go hand-in-hand) so, at that point, i already had a dog, and i had noticed my allergic reation to dogs had gone waaay down. Anyhow, i went to my friends place nore and more, and i was spending more and more time at her place, then i realized how annoying i was, aaaand i decided to rescue a stray kitten. Probably not the best life point. Anyhow, by now, i have spent a tooon of time around cats and my asthma is very rarely triggered by it. (Only when i try to wash them T-T) okay, if youre reading this, please stick with me a little longer. You said that you really love doing sports, right? And that triggers your asthma? Okay, here are.my 3 suggestions: 1. Breathe deep. Okay, this sounds so stupid, but really, it works. I have like 50 post-its around my room, and whenenver i see it, i breathe in till it feels like my lungs will burst. Sure, it hurts, but now i have far more strength in my lungs. 2. Just do it. If you like running, run. If you like swimming, swim. If you like basket ball, play basket ball. I love horseback riding. And it used to be incredibly painful to me. I mean, sure, it gets hard to breathe, but the more you do it, the better ypu get. 3. Dont use the albuterol. This is probably the most ridiculous sounding one, but, just please listen. For a long time, when i was about age 12, every night i got into bed, i would suddenly get really tight. Like, i couldnt even breathe tight. But then, one night, i realised i had used up my albuterol. And my sister and i share it, so i couldnt use hers. So, i had 2 options, breathe it out, or go to the hospital. It wasnt bad, so i chose to breathe it out. It was really hard, and i fell asleep at 2 am, and had trouble breathing all day. The next night,ni did the same thing. About 3 weeks later, my sister got the albuterol, but surprisingly enough, i didnt need it. My lungs were really strong from that short period of time! Okay... sorry, got kind of derailed there... anyhow... hopes that helps...
No, seriously, you’re right. I luckily don’t have to deal with allergy related asthma much except in the spring, but of course your lungs get stronger the more you exercise. Also, albuterol doesn’t help much anyways so I have no problem not using it.
 

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