I think my betta is sick :/

SadieG

Member
Hello,


I was sent here from another forum and told that people here are more active and helpful and I need some help. This is my first betta so I am not familiar with them at all. My betta sits in a 1/2 gallon tank (I KNOW I KNOW but we don't have much room) and I change his water about once a week. At my office, where he originally was supposed to stay, I first used Zephyrhills water but changed to cheaper tap water and always used BettaMax Bowl Conditioner. Everything was fine even though the temp. was a bit too cold (our boss had this thing with 75 degrees). So long story short, He had to move home with me where we have a water softner. The first week I noticed a film forming on the top of his bowl that was clear but when you disturbed it, it broke kinda like a napkin when it's drenched into smaller pieces. He seemed okay but I noticed he has lost most of his color and instead of being as active he sits mostly towards the bottom or he rests on top of the plant I have. I have since changed his water and used bottled with the conditioner and there is no film. He seemed to get better but now he has lost his color again (almost all grey and very little red left) and he won't eat. I feed him that Gold Pellet stuff and he used to eat all the time (ate a week after I changed his water and there was no film) but now he gets the food in his mouth and spits it out. I tried to feed him a dried bloodworm but he wouldn't even go near it. I also noticed that his top fins are getting thinner. I don't know what to do.


Sorry this ended up being so long but I wanted to be sure to include as much as I could.

Before (no long has gravel but glass stones)



Now (bad camera phone quality but he's actually more grey)
 

atmmachine816

Member
Well I wish I could help you but I don't know lots about bettas though not to worry Chickadee should be on soon to help you, she keeps bettas due to room space too I think.

Austin
 

chickadee

Member
It is going to be very difficult to do anything to help him in that container.  He would be better off in a large plastic bucket (has to be a brand new one and never used with any chemicals).  You could put a heater in it and an airstone with an airline and airpump.  He can get by on that but he is going to have to go into a filtered tank sooner or later.  The little 3 gallon tanks are not that much better but they can be heated and filtered.  He needs warm water and clean water and he is going to have to have them now I am afraid.  It sounds like he may be horribly constipated because of cold water and his metabolism being slowed down and starting to get finrot for the same reasons.  

You need to get him into warmer water and then put him into a place where he is not getting water that has softener salt in it.  It is dangerous to fish.  His water needs to be as clean as possible and free of ammonia, nitrites, and nitrates.  This is going to mean probably 50% daily water changes unless he is in a cycled tank.  You also need to have a Master Test Kit to be running tests for ammonia, nitrite, and nitrates to make sure that he is not building up poisoning in the water.  I know this is a lot of work but if he is going to make it, it is going to take giving him some help.  HEAT is the big thing and CLEAN water is not far behind.

Then I want you to fast him.  NO FOOD  If he is constipated, trying to stuff more in is just going to  complicate things all the more.  He can have some frozen pea that has been defrosted and peeled in a couple of days.  I am going to give you a link to read the basics and also encourage you to stay with us and keep us informed of his progress daily if you would or more often if you feel we can help.  There is usually someone around every little bit and checking on the posts.

Peas (how to handle the constipation problem)

Place ONE frozen pea on a saucer and microwave for 30 seconds without water or just to take all the chill out and defrost it
Take all the peeling off the pea.
Cut a tiny piece off one of the halves of the pea that you find inside (about half the size of the fish's eye)
Cut that tiny piece into 3 pieces or so (I know, not easy but they need it small to eat it)
Place a piece on a clean fingertip or plastic spoon tip and slide it into the water and let it go when you have his attention.

The reason I need to have you fast him is also if he is hungry he will eat the peas usually with no argument.  Usually they will not try them unless they are hungry and once they do try them they LOVE them.

If I can help more, let me know or perhaps some of the others will come along and chime in.  Welcome to Fishlore.com.  We do love our bettas here and I promise we are going to do our best to help you.

Rose


 (here is the Betta Guide)
 
  • Thread Starter

SadieG

Member
Just curious as to why he would be like this now and not sooner as I have had him for 4 months now.

I honestly don't have room for a bigger tank and I wish I did, I don't want to be neglectful or a bad fish parent. I think I might be able to do a 1 gallon tank that has a filter and light but that's the best we can do. I will keep everyone updated on his condition and thank you for your advice.



This is what he is currently residing in (but with glass stones not gravel):


Would this tank be suitable? We just don't have much room to get anything very big :-\



YAY I found his light but do you think it would give enough heat to make him happier?
 

cherryrose

Member
HI SadieG,

Welcome to fishlore. I am new myself, but am learning quickly. Chickadee has wonderful advice. It was because of her advice, as well as the others on this forum, that I was able to keep my first betta, Barney alive. He is doing very well as is my other betta, Benji. They are in separate tanks of course. I had my sick betta, Barney, in a gallon jar, which was unheated and uncycled. He has recovered nicely and is now in a 10-gallon, which he loves. It is heated, filtered and completely cycled and is very easy to care for. You really do need a bigger bowl or preferably a tank for your betta to live in. It must be heated and it must be aerated for him to survive. A filter is also very important. The fact that your betta was able to survive for 4 months in the small container the pet store sold you is both a tribute to his will to survive as well as a tribute to your care. A container of larger than 2 gallons is so much better. You might look at some of the larger critter keepers. Your Betta could survive in the one gallon that you asked about, but only if it is heated and you do frequent water changes to keep the ammonia, nitrites, and nitrates down. Also, forget about the under gravel filter. They just suck the waste down under the gravel where it becomes trapped and ends up causing even more problems. You could get a small corner filter instead. There are also heaters that you can buy that are specifically made for tanks 5 gallons and under. If you want a truly happy betta a minimum of a five-gallon tank would be best. Is there any way you can rearrange your space in order to make room for a larger tank? My bettas both love the peas, and they are necessary in order to clear up and prevent constipation. Chickadee is one of our experts on bettas in this forum. If you follow her advice, you and your betta will most likely make it through this trial.

CherryRose
 

OneMom

Member
HI Sadie:

We experienced the exact same problem you are having back in September of this year. Our fish (Angel) had done great for almost ONE YEAR. Then, the temps started dropping here (we live in WI) and she grew pale & listless. She would sit on the bottom of her 2 gal bowl & barely move. (My kids were convinced she was dead.)

We finally bit the bullet & got a 10 gallon tank with a heater & filter. OMG!! She is a different fish..she is so happy. She swims around like crazy and does tricks for food. Her color is bright once again & her finrot has disappeared.

The heater made all the difference in the world. We didn't have the money (or the space) for a 10 gallon tank, but somehow we made it work. My whole family is so glad we did. She is a funny fish....we can't get over how goofy her personality is now. We all joke, "She loves living in a mansion!"

If you're able to make the necessary changes, I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at how much fun Barney will be.

Good Luck!

Wendy
 

chickadee

Member
Well I realize what it is like not to have much space because I am sitting on top of 4 tanks of bettas and otos and cories.  But they are all big enough to heat and cycle with good filters.  Here are a few examples.  (one secret is if you do not have table room, try a tall tank.  They do not have as much side-to-side room but they will swim up and down.  At least it is big enough to heat and filter.

I am afraid the little tank you showed me is not suitable.  For one thing it is not big enough to heat.  The tank needs to be at least 2.5 gallons to safely heat.  It also has an undergravel filter and that is the worst type you can have.  It is basically a tank for cold water fish like goldfish.

If you want the smallest tank you can get and still have the filter and heater and light I shall show you.

(this is the minimum and you will have to add a 25 watt heater and gravel and any plants or decorations you want but otherwise everything is there)

(this is the best, better light and filter and better quality all around)

(the best 25watt heater - I checked the others and they are just as expensive and they do not have LIFETIME warranties)

Now if you want an instant cycle and I do not know how much money you are willing to put into the little guy but Bio-spira is an instant cycle...you shake the Bio-spira bag and open it and dump it into the tank and add the fish.  Cycle is done.  You will have a slight ammonia spike when the filter is settling in but the tank is safe for your fish and you do not do a water change for 7 days while the bacteria set up shop.

The cost of the Bio-spira is less at another vendor but the postage and handling is almost double of the cost here so it all works out to cost about exactly the same. 

(you would need the 1 ounce size of FRESHWATER type Bio-spira)  (the shipping is $19.99 but on the other site although the Bio-spira is only $8.99 the shipping and handling is about $34.00 and the last batch I got was not really all that active)

This is all entirely up to you.  There are even bigger tanks that if you go to Walmart you can get for less money.


so sorry, I changed the link to the proper one. Thanks LZ!!   :-[
This is the one my bettas live in and it takes up no more room than the small ones, it just stands taller.  It has a good light and filter  just needs the heater and gravel and whatever you want to decorate with. 

Hope this gives you some idea of what you might do.  If you do not want a kit with everything included then there are cheaper larger tanks and sponge filters and heaters you can buy individually but as I said they are the bigger tanks.

Rose
 

LZ Floyd

Member
Welcome to the forum, SadieG.  I'm new to the Betta hobby, too, and have found some great advice here at fishlore.com.  Our Betta was nearly dead two Tuesday's ago, but with the advice of Rose and others on this site, along with doing the legwork needed to be done, our Betta is doing great.  He's currently awaiting transfer to a new 5-gallon aquarium that is prepped but in need of a heater, which is on the way.

If you haven't read them, there are a few stickys worth reading at the top of the Betta page; I found the material useful, anyway.

The aquarium we decided to put our Betta in is an Aqua-Tech Hex 5, which we got from Wal-Mart.  But the same tank can be gotten from PetCo () for the same price, and I believe the tank at PetCo is a better version of the Marineland product.  (I've seen them both unpackaged and do believe the PetCo version is better quality.)  I mention this aquarium as it was a) suggested to me; b) appears to have a footprint not dissimilar from the ones you are currently looking at; and, c) is in the same price range as other aquariums already noted.  This is also the aquarium I believe Rose meant to link you to at Drs. Foster and Smith (when I clicked that link, I got the Bio-Spira page).  Whichever route you decide to go, it will be an improvement over keeping your Betta in a 1/2 gallon container. 

Good luck and keep us updated.

Mike
 

Phloxface

Member
I'm currently treating a sick fish in a 4 gallon Kritter Keeper. Although I am moving her to a split 10 gallon later the tank she is in now is perfectly acceptable as a permanent home. It is large enough for a 25 watt heater (if money is an issue I use Top Fin heaters which are under $20), a small Whisper internal filter (around $12) and the tank itself is about $14 and has a lid. You can buy an optional light later. The tank dimensions are about 14"x8"x9 1/2" which is very compact and fits in the smallest area. I have 5 tanks all in one room which I also sleep and watch TV in so I know all about finding space, but this tank is really very small and can easily fit on a sturdy nightstand.
Please seriously consider this tank. The 1/2 gallon tank is far too small. You will have a happier and healthier fish.

Here's a link to the tank. It's the large one. The others are too small.
 

chickadee

Member
Well the very best heater there is costs $16.99 and the tank at Petco that we are talking about (the Hex5) has the filter and light on it already for $29.99. I am sorry to say that purchasing the filter, tank and light and heater all seperately will cost way more than the $46.98 that it takes to get the tank kit and heater. I am not saying you have to do this any particular way but this really is about the cheapest route.

Like, LZ says you will be amazed at the difference in the betta when he is given good care and a filtered tank with heat and lots of good clear clean water.

How is the food/constipation issue coming?

One other thing, I think you said that he had glass pebbles in his tanklet. Are they the large flat ones or the marble types? It really does not make any difference as both the kinds are not going to remain suitable. There is just too much room for the waste to fall down between them and never get vacuumed out. It will eventually foul the water and make your fish very ill. I am afraid just plain old tank gravel (available in a lot of colors) is the best for bettas. Not sand as they have a tendency to get real cute once in a while and try to eat something off the bottom that they think is food and I lost a little girl when she ate some of the fine substrate and got plugged up. I would never have known but she was pure white and the substrate was EcoComplete which is black and I could see it through her scales in her tummy after she died. The larger (small pea sized) gravel is the best.

Rose
 

Phloxface

Member
I agree the Hex 5 is cheaper as a kit. I was just offering a choice based on size because this seemed to be an issue. I have a Hex 5 tank and 2 Kritter Keepers and the Kritter Keeper does take up less space.  If she can find room for a Hex 5 then all the better. I have my Hex 5 on my nightstand so it's not too big but the Kritter Keeper fits right on my desk hutch.

BTW, you all are lucky to live in the US and be able to get a Hex 5 for $29.99!  I live in Canada and my Hex 5 cost me $79.99 and the
Visi-Therm Stealth Heater costs $45 here!    That heater is just way more than I can afford, at least in Canada. Everything here costs so much more, and our dollar is almost equal to yours so it's not just the exchange rate.

I also agree about the glass marbles. It may look pretty but does trap waste. I am in the process of changing over the substrate in both my 10 gallon tanks because the gravel is too large and I find a huge amount of waste deep down when I vaccum.
 

nmwierman1977

Member
HI Sadie. Welcome to fishlore. I am still pretty new at Betta's too, but I have had my Betta now for 4 months. I started him out in a 1 gallon tank and at first he was happy and building his bubble nets, but after 2 months of living in it he realized he wanted more room to swim around in. The way I found out was that he was harming himself by biting his tail every chance he got. He did a lot of damage to his tail. I decided right then that I was going to move him into a bigger tank. I have the exact same tank that Rose has and he loves it. I've had to deal with a few other issues at hand besides just his tail, but everything is cleared up now and his tail is starting to regenerate. I only live in a 700 square foot condo, so I know what it's like to not have a lot of counter space, but trust me when I tell you the marinland Hex 5 tank is not that big. It's a lot more taller then it is wide. I have mine sitting on the b'fast bar in the living room. He can watch me in the kitchen when I cook and he can watch me in the living room. I honestly didn't think I was going to have the room for a 5 gallon tank, but when I found this it was perfect and I made room for it.Not only that, but it forces me to keep the clutter off the b'fast bar. So, please consider getting him a 5 gallon tank like the Hex 5 that was mentioned. You will see a totally different fish if you do. I promise. Again welcome aboard. Natalie
 

AesSedai

Member
(((Sadie))) I'm glad you found the help you needed. This forum is so great and the people here clearly love their Bettas and have learned a lot about their care! I just love being here.
 
  • Thread Starter

SadieG

Member
AesSedaI said:
(((Sadie))) I'm glad you found the help you needed. This forum is so great and the people here clearly love their Bettas and have learned a lot about their care! I just love being here.

Thank you for bringing me here....unfortunately it was too late. :'( :'( :'(
Rico died last night at 8:00p and I've been a wreck since. I know it's just a fish and it's been 4 months but I get attached which is why my boyfriend and I decided no more pets for me, my hearts too big.


Oh and I forgot who mentioned it but Rico did not live in the tank from the store, that wasn't even a tank it was tupperware as far as I was concerned :/ I bought him a little tank so he had a little room to move and stuff. I think I will stick around and lurk and read to get more information in case I do change my mind but for now I think it's best I just don't have any pets. Especially if I want to get another betta, I want more room to properly take care of one although I really did the best that I could with what I knew and had. The sad part is that I actually watched his last moments unknowingly. He sits up higher than from where I sit on the bed and I can't see him sometimes because I built up the stones so it's like a little wall that he can kinda hide behind (Chickadee they were large and round edged). Anyways he had been laying down all day and all of sudden he flopped up and swam a little then dived down and didn't move from then...so I looked and there he was


Thanks for everyone's help and advice, it's really appreciated. I'm still not sure what happened to Rico but thanks for everything!


nmwierman1977: You know what, I did notice that the first few months he made A lot of bubble nests and I would joke with him to cut it out because he wasn't having any babies. He stopped making them 2 months ago and I thought that maybe they just stop sometimes. I guess that should have been my first sign :/ I thought he was happy enough swimming a lot and always doing fun stuff, he was really active.
 

gammerus

Member
I know it is tough, I felt horrible when I lost my first Betta to over feeding but don't let it keep you from enjoying more animals in your life. You clearly cared about Rico and miss him, but don't let it keep you down. There are many more Betta's that are likely to never see a real home in their life, and could use a caring owner like yourself. Of course I do reccomend getting a nice setup before you acquire a new one (petsmart and walmart have sales all the time)
 
  • Thread Starter

SadieG

Member
gammerus said:
I know it is tough, I felt horrible when I lost my first Betta to over feeding but don't let it keep you from enjoying more animals in your life. You clearly cared about Rico and miss him, but don't let it keep you down. There are many more Betta's that are likely to never see a real home in their life, and could use a caring owner like yourself. Of course I do reccomend getting a nice setup before you acquire a new one (petsmart and walmart have sales all the time)
Yea its not so much the money, its just the room which we lack. once we get something bigger maybe I will consider getting another but who knows.
 

gammerus

Member
you don't need a lot of room really, even a tea pitcher can hold a better well enough (that is if your room was warm enough)

but anyway, don't feel rushed or anything. There is time enough in the future for fish, chill out and enjoy the holiday season there is plenty left.
 

cherryrose

Member
:'( I am so sorry that your betta, Rico, didn't make it. :'( I am also one of those people that become very attached to any pet I have, even if other's think I am silly for caring that much. The only thing that helps me when I lose a pet is acquiring a new one. I never consider a new pet as a replacement for a lost, beloved friend. A new fish can never replace one that I have bonded with, but it would be able to help me deal with the pain. If you save a betta that would otherwise have to live out it's short life in a tiny cup, and give it a good home, you have done a good thing. A life in a 1-gallon tank is better than a life in a tiny cup, or no life at all. This is just my opinion, but it is also how I survive in an unfair world.

CherryRose
 

chickadee

Member
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

First of all, let me say how very sorry I am that Rico did not make it. It was obvious that you cared deeply for him. You have my deepest sympathies.

Those of us who have lost Bettas have also learned that it is usually a mistake to make a final decision on whether to get another betta while you are grieving the loss of a beloved one. There have been some who have said "never again" and some of them have changed their minds and gone on to be great Betta parents and I do not believe that they regret it. There are also, most unfortunately, those who are not able to put their grief behind them and so they cannot bring themselves to try again. I will not try to change your mind, but let me say this much...at least wait until you have had a few days to get the worst of the grief over before you make a final decision on all fish. I am a true believer that it is the greatest tribute you can pay to a pet that you love to want another because they showed you how important they were in life. When Emma died a few days ago, I could not stand the thought of an empty tank, but that is me. I do not replace my pets as such, but I find that I have to get another to quit the grieving process.

You must do what you feel is best, but do not shut the door on the idea of ever having more fish, please. The little guy got a start in life somehow that was so much better than living in the cups in the store and you loved him and cared for him. You invested a part of yourself into him and it shows that you do have the capacity to love a pet very much and it would truly be a shame if you decided never to try again right now when you are probably not able to make a really objective decision.

You are always welcome here. Having a betta is not a requirement and perhaps just keeping in touch on Fishlore.com will help you to feel better.

We do have a Memorial Board, if you would like to post a small memorial to Rico. You are certainly welcome to. Those of us who have lost our fish and just feel sad do this sometimes. It does seem to help just knowing that they will not be totally forgotten.
Please let us know if we can do anything for you.

Rose
:'(
 

AesSedai

Member
Dear (((Sadie)))

I am so sorry for the loss of Rico! So sorry!!

I know I harped a lil about a bigger tank for him but I want you to know that even if you had left Rico in a tupperware cup (I know that's not the case), he would have been, still, so much better off because he was with you and was loved and cared for. It's not the size of the tank, it's the size of the owners heart.

I hope you don't let your huge heart prevent you from having another Betta. They need your heart. Loss is the suckiest part of life, definitely! Are you sure you have to accept the double loss of loosing Rico *and* the loss of having that wonderful experience with another Betta again... ?

The joy, laughs, love and the wiggles that Rico brought you....that is waiting for you right now, again, on some shelf in some store somewhere.

If you're willing to lose again, you can be free to love again. I hope you are.

I'm so sorry and saddened by your loss. I wish I could hug you for real ((((((((((((((((Sadie))))))))))))))))

Karyn
 

nmwierman1977

Member
Sadie- I am deeply sorry that you lost Rico, but please do not make any rash decisions yet as to not wanting to try again with another Betta. They are such great fish. Take a few days or even a couple weeks to think about it. If you do decide to get another one think about all of the suggestions that were given to you and get atleast a 5 gallon tank and try to find room for one. If you do get one cycle it first and then get your betta. Like the expression goes ' if there is a will there is way' to do something if you want it badly enough. That has always been a big motto with me. Again I am truly sorry for your loss. I too get very attached to my pets. I treat them as if they were my children. Natalie
 
  • Thread Starter

SadieG

Member
Well, I don't think it's just because of Rico that I don't want another pet. I had a cat before that I had since the 3rd day it was born and the cat died from cancer 9 years later. I never got over that to this day and its been 4 years since. I get too attached and while I know that death is a part of life and all that I just don't like losing pets (not that anyone does) and don't deal well with them not being there one day.


Like you all said maybe one day ill get another one but for now I think its better not to have one. anyways thank you all for your kind words and support, I know other people might think its a bit silly because it's just a small little betta but at least I know I'm not the only one that gets sad when you lose one.
 

Timesdragonfly

Member
I don 't think it's silly at all. I just lost my rat, georgette. I cried! It was terrible. And no one seemed to understand because she was a rat and ppl are afraid of them. She was a clean, sweet, and friendly girl!. I'll miss her, and you have every right to miss rico! him being a fish has nothing to do with it!
~J~
 

AesSedai

Member
(((Sadie)))

I will cry when Zen dies. Just the thought is enough to tell me I will. I think this quality, loving animals so much, is a very special quality that I wish more people had. Have you ever watched Animal Cops? I CANNOT watch it. I go into lil rages at the tv when I see abuse to animals. I bet you can't watch it either.

The first thing I ever wanted to be was a veterinarian. I 'job shadowed' that position from school. I figured out quickly that I wouldn't be able to do that, that I couldn't see the animals suffer...not even long enough to help them (and now I want to rescue the sickest Bettas I can find and try to bring them back and keep them healthy and happy...crazy heartbreak possibilty there...)

See, you're far from weird...or alone in your feelings about animals.

It's been a pleasure getting to you know you (((Big Heart)))

Happy Holidays hun. In your own time or not at all, what's right for you is right.

Namaste
 

nmwierman1977

Member
Any kind of pet that you may have no matter what it is becomes a part of your family. I used to have a cocker spaniel when I was a kid. We had him for 10 years. He died of cancer. The vet wanted to put him down, but my dad out right refused that because he was a part of our family and even though he was suffering we felt that he should die in his home and that is what he did. He died in his sleep in his bed. The night he died I actually thought he may have had a chance to make it after all because he was acting better and was even eating. And up until that night I gave him a hug and kiss and told him I loved him.That night I didn't do that because I thought well maybe he may still have a chance because he was acting fine. Well he ended up dying instead. I still regret from this day not telling him I love him and giving him that hug and kiss. I went to school that morning in hopes that it would help me get through the day. Well the subject in that class was about death and killing and I had to get up and leave in the middle of it because I couldn't handle it. It just hurt too much to sit there and listen to the professor when I was suffering from a loved ones death. I went to my boyfriends and he comforted me. I cried what seemed like forever. So, no you are not crazy at all for feeling the way that you feel. I'm sure that in due time you will get another pet when you are ready. Natalie
P.S. have a wonderful holiday season.
 

0morrokh

Member
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
I am so sorry about your loss.
There is nothing wrong with not wanting to get more pets for a while after loosing one. They are our best friends and it is hard to loose them. But I think maybe you will find yourself eventually wanting another Betta or some other type of pet. It never fails with me. For now just know that it's not your fault Rico passed away. You did everything you could to care for him. Trust me, we all make mistakes the first time we try keeping fish...but in the end it is so rewarding. Just let us know if there is anything we can do, or if you have any questions.
 

LZ Floyd

Member
Sadie, it was really sad to read about your loss of Rico, our hearts and best wishes go out to you.

Seems odd to think of these creatures as something we own when, to us, they are dear family members.  And when one passes on, it's really painful.  It's even harder to lose one of our pets around holidays like the ones upon us now.  We lost a kitty suddenly and unexpectedly on October 5 this year, a special little guy named Lightning who was a littermate to his surviving brother, and my buddy.  Let me just say that Christmas is a holiday we celebrate at our house, and this one will be tough without my little buddy Lightning.  But experience tells me things will be okay.

With Rico, I believe you did the best you could to help him.  That Bettas seem to need so much more in the way of space and heat than we are inclined to give them as new Betta owners, is a fact not well advertised.  To find this out may have come as much a surprise to you as to us.  That doesn't help with the pain of losing Rico, but it does let you know that I'm not convinced, and neither should you be, that Rico died because of mistakes on your part.  In fact, when he came up ill, you sought help and that tells me you cared a great deal about Rico.

As to your grief, each of us will encounter and deal with it in our own way.  There is no tried-and-true method, the resolution of your grief will come in it's own time and way.  What I can say is that, time plays a role in helping us feel better when we've lost a loved one.  In my case, I can't say I've ever gotten over the loss of one of my beloved pets, but I have adjusted to their being gone.

Treat yourself well, Sadie; take whatever time you need to grieve the loss of Rico.  You are not different from the rest of us, and I believe things will get better for you.  And, someday, I suspect, you'll decide to offer your home to another little creature.  If you're like most of us, you'll be the happier for it.

Mike
 
  • Thread Starter

SadieG

Member
I think I'm better now that he's buried (yeah I buried him, couldn't bear to flush him) and I don't see him. A girl at work today was telling me she wanted to get one for her husband for christmas and I made sure to tell her in advance all the things you all told me so he would be happy and healthy for a long time. she thought that just putting him in a little vase would be fine because at pet stores they sit in those little containers. she is still getting one and knows now what to do to make sure he's happy so I was excited that even though mine wasn't able to live long mainly because I wasn't aware of how to properly care for one, at least this one has a better chance.





thanks again for all your thoughts and comments. I know its weird because its such a small little thing but those guys have so much personality that when they go you miss them like a family member. I think I'm better off without animals for awhile but you all have encouraged me to not give up completely because at least if I got another I know it would have a better life with me than being stuck in a cage or bowl.
 

AlfaBetta

Member
SadieG said:
Just curious as to why he would be like this now and not sooner as I have had him for 4 months now.
Your Betta likely died from the difference in the type of water you used at work vs at home. I don't think the other factors like tank size and temperature killed him unless those factors also changed when you moved him home. I know you're still sad about the loss, but don't be discouraged from owning Bettas. You tried your best to find a solution to a problem and that's all that really matters. Even experienced fishkeepers lose fish once in awhile for mysterious unknown reasons and sometimes it's just beyond our control. For example I had a tiger barb disappear completely from a community tank overnight and couldn't find any remains the next day. I knew the other fish couldn't have consumed the tiger barb in so short of a time period since he was fairly large in size. I bought a replacement tiger barb a week later and all is well. I know losing Bettas are little different because they have their own little personalities but sometimes these things happen and you just have to try and learn from the experience.
 

Most photos, videos and links are disabled if you are not logged in.

Log in or register to view

Top Bottom