I Think I'll Name Him Derp...

I should have known it a danger to step through the doorway of the LFS, my cycled tank a mere five miles away, at home. I loitered in front of the shelf of bettas, in all their newly stocked glory; a koi female, black orchid male, halfmoons, veil tails. It should have been anticipated that the least attractive of all the bettas would suit my fancy. The fattest one, a king betta, pouted in the edges of his cup, pale and pink and worm-like. His nostrils were accented by dark rings, giving him the appearance of an indignant horse, massive nostrils flared enormously. The eyes of the worm-betta were so pale blue they were nearly white, making his unblinking gaze unsettling to the observer. And yet, in his misshapen, discolored state, he was endearing. I took him home.


He settled in fast, as a healthy fish should. His fins were intact and transparent, short enough to allow his maneuver of the uneven terrain. He acclimated well, greeting me shyly upon my entrance to the room, poking his head out from the mass of plants. It was in feeding him that I became most puzzled. Not only was her appearance bizarre; so were his mannerisms. He would rush to my finger, excited, as I swirled in pinches of food, then watch them steadily descend to the gravel. Dried bloodworms, freeze-dried brine shrimp, and frozen foods were sampled, briefly, but of no interest. He was indifferent. It was an impulse to try to touch him, when he approached my finger. I expected him to slip away, or bite, or somehow protest my invasion into his aquatic bubble of personal space. And yet he rubbed against my finger, unperturbed, giving himself a good ol' scratch.

Honestly, I am stumped by this fish. His unwillingness to eat canbe expected from a new addition, but his environmental indifference was not! He is fairly active and explorative, even trying to nibble at the pest snails in his tank. I've never, ever, encountered a fish quite like him, which prompts me to contemplate naming him Derp, accounting for his mental attributes. Once he is fully adjusted to his new environment, I will settle the matter of naming. For now, I guess, I'll just continue to post his weird and fishy evolution. In time, I think, he will grow to be a white, yellow, and black splotched koi, with blue streaks upon his rays. I will not get my hopes up, though, lest he remain a worm forever!



P.S. I think he may also be glass surfing, but I don't know whatever for. The tank is a jungle of live plants, dragon-stone, and driftwood, factoring out much of the glass's mirroring ability...

 

I am very curious to see what he looks like from what you described of him, however the pictures you linked are not working.

 

Voila! I promise, he looks much weirder in person...

 

Woooow what a funny looking guy! I think Derp fits him perfectly.

 

Great narrative. He is indeed an odd one. The face looks like my common goldfish.

 

love the tank! You should name him worm for his similar appearance haha

 

He’s beautiful! Sounds like quite the character too. Lovely fish.

 

Awwwwe thank you! He certainly is a character... I’ve started to notice that he “stalks” me; when I enter the room he follows me, hiding behind plants, and eyeing my every move. I’ll post some pictures soon displaying his mastery of the art of stealth.

 

Wowww you succeeded to describe a character in a name hahaha. Derp is such a great name.

 

Derp or Deebo

 

Four months later, the tables have turned. As “Derp” settled in to his enclosure, his personality began to grow and adapt. His grotesque features and blunt body perfectly exhibit his brutal nature. He eats now, with an aggressive attack, shaking the dried blood worms I provide for him as would a dog for the kill. He still stalks me, gloating, when I enter a room, spends the evening plucking baby snails from their shells and eating them. His frown is perpetual. He hates everything. No longer do I call him “Derp.” He’s Mr. [Cur]Mudgeon now, eternally expressing his hatred for the world. You don’t dare approach him if you value the usage of your hands. Oh, and he’s started to marble!

 

 

Wow what a beauty. Btw where do I purchase your books? Your stories and narration is priceless!!