I give up....

I give up trying to help a friend with her tanks. She insists on not researching anything and thinks she knows everything. She already killed most of her fish. By her account, it was caused by a broken thermometer. I could believe that, if it were only one tank that was affected. But it wasn't, it was 3 tanks. She lost all but 5 or 6 fish, when she had probably 100 counting fry. Many were guppy and endler's livebearer fry that I had just given her.

Today she decided to go to a Walmart about 40 miles away that sells fish. It's the closest place to buy fish other than bettas. So what do you think she bought? 9- 1" comet and common goldfish and a common pleco to put in her 50 gallon fish tank...a tank that already has a 4"-5" fantail goldfish, a few guppies, and a few BN pleco babies that she didn't kill. She plans to put the goldfish in a water tank outside in the spring that she's going to 'bury' and use as a pond. However, the tank is less than 200 gallons (I can't remember exactly how many, but it's more than 150 and less than 200). This tank is not big enough for 10 goldfish and a common pleco!!

She refuses to acclimate fish at all, just dropping them into her tanks when she gets them. She cleans her tanks maybe once a month, then wonders why she is constantly have algae blooms, bacterial blooms, and minI cycles.

I just give up, she won't listen to reason. What's the old saying? No sense beating a dead horse? That's the point I feel I'm at with this friend

One thing's for sure, she won't be getting anymore fish from me, and I'm going to see if I can get the few remaining guppies (the ones she didn't manage to kill) back from her. Sigh....

Edit to add that her response to my saying that her tank won't be big enough for them all is "It's 200 gallons, it will hold a few". True, but it won't hold 9! Ugh...

 

Sadly some people just cannot be reasoned with. I have dealt with a few myself.

 

She killed Endler fry??? There are some friends' who turn out to have a side that we just don't want to know!

I have to admit, after my daughter's friend killer some Endler's that we have her, and I had to rescue the rest, I really had reservations about the friendship. Nice family, but they're ruining the kid by spoiling her. We've hardly seen them since then, and I think it's just as well. It's hard enough raising a tween without her seeing what a friend gets away with!

 

She killed everything she had except a fantail goldfish, 2 or 3 adult guppies, 2 or 3 baby BN plecos, and 1 male platy. She blames it on the broken thermometer (claims it was cracked and apparently leaking), but the fry were in a completely separate tank so that shouldn't have affected them. I had just given her about 15 Endler's and 10 or so Blue moscow guppy fry and she killed those too. She won't treat her water...she thinks since she has a well that it's not necessary. She doesn't acclimate fish at all--just dumps them in. We often order fish together to cut the shipping costs. Usually they come to me and I take hers to her, but when we got the BN plecos they were delivered to her . I was getting 4 plecos and some baby mystery snails. I took some betta cups to transport them in (we only live about 20 miles from each other). When I got there, she already had them waiting for me--4 baby plecos in ONE betta cup with at least 50 baby mystery snails??? Surprisingly, only 2 of the plecos were dead. If memory serves, she'd had them in the cup for at least an hour before I got there.

She just aggravates me to death when it comes to fish. I'm really getting tired of hearing her complain about things going on in her tanks when she won't listen to any suggestions I, or anyone else for that matter, give her on how to fix them.

This is the same friend who had daphnia and other aquatic critters growing in the substrate of her (then) heavily-stocked tank last summer. She had had the tank up and running at least 3 months and had NEVER cleaned it!

 

Poor fish! It sounds like you need a break from her to save yourself a lot of stress. It really gets to me watching train wrecks that are just downright avoidable. I've having to avoid a friend whose son has been bullied now for 3 years, but all she'll do is complain and not actually take any measures to stop it. He a beautiful, intelligent child, and it's awful to see him turning into a depressed recluse at age 12. All I can do is refuse to listen to her anymore and hope that she comes to her senses and just keeps him home

 

Beating a dead horse makes the meat more tender. Most americans like tender meat.

 

Beating a dead horse makes the meat more tender. Most americans like tender meat.

You're so bad! I'll have to tell my daughter this one--she'll repeat it at school tomorrow!