LyndaB
- #1
What to do if you spot a man who’s driven his sports car into a snow bank, rear end first:
Park vehicle and put flashers on…. walk towards his car shaking head from side to side grinning while driver sits in car and guns it trying to jackrabbit his way out of the snow bank.
Approach the driver and the kind man who’s stopped to assist him…. share “and they say women can’t drive?” and share a chuckle with both men.
Ask a few civil questions to assure the driver’s not injured and then begin dialogue with driver....
“How the heck did you do this?”
“The on-ramp was icy.”
Look down referred to on-ramp and say “There’s no ice on the on-ramp, how fast were you going?”
Try to decipher mumbled response.... offer a possible response.
“25-30?”
“Yeah, 25-30.”
Look down on-ramp at the tire marks he left when he spun out and say “Do you think you might mean 65-70?” Watch man who originally stopped to help him start smirking and fold arms over his chest, grateful that he’s not the victI'm here.
“I wasn’t going that fast.”
“I’m not buying that, this guy’s not buying that and the cops aren’t gonna buy that so you might want to work on your story….. now let’s see if we can get you out.”
Appraise situation. Laugh to yourself at his sissy rims and short car frame and remain bedazzled at the fact that his car is in the bank tail end first.
“Do you have anything you can lay on the ground in front of your rear tires to give us traction?”
“No.”
Go back to Jeep and retrieve bag of potting soil. Ask him to spread half of the bag in front of each rear tire and admire the way he doesn’t seem to notice that his wingtips are getting ruined. While he’s spreading it, he says “is this potting soil?”
“Yes, cat litter also works well.” He seems truly amazed.
Have him get in driver’s seat and tell him to very gently, very slowly, see if that afforded him traction. Tell him to point his front end down hill and see if he can get the car onto the pavement. Listen to wheel’s spin out as he again pretends he’s a jackrabbit.
“Slowly!”
“That wasn’t fast.”
“Was that how slow you came up the on-ramp?” Receive high five from the other man, who still seems to be enjoying himself immensely. “Do you at least have a full tank of gas to give us some leverage?”
“No.”
“Does WalMart still have a driver’s license kiosk way in the back of the store?” Roll eyes while other man holds his gut because he’s laughing so hard.
Try rocking car, try pushing car, try pleading with car. Avoid slapping the driver upside the head while he continues to race the wheels. Realize that nothing short of a wrecker can get this dude out of this mess. Remain grateful that his racing tires never caught the pavement because we all would’ve been killed. Say a silent thank you to your father who taught you and your siblings defensive driving with a health dose of common sense and self-preservation thrown in the mix. Bid adieu to both gentlemen, walk back to Jeep, give it a fond pat for always getting you where you need to go safely and for not having sissy rims and finish the commute to work.
Park vehicle and put flashers on…. walk towards his car shaking head from side to side grinning while driver sits in car and guns it trying to jackrabbit his way out of the snow bank.
Approach the driver and the kind man who’s stopped to assist him…. share “and they say women can’t drive?” and share a chuckle with both men.
Ask a few civil questions to assure the driver’s not injured and then begin dialogue with driver....
“How the heck did you do this?”
“The on-ramp was icy.”
Look down referred to on-ramp and say “There’s no ice on the on-ramp, how fast were you going?”
Try to decipher mumbled response.... offer a possible response.
“25-30?”
“Yeah, 25-30.”
Look down on-ramp at the tire marks he left when he spun out and say “Do you think you might mean 65-70?” Watch man who originally stopped to help him start smirking and fold arms over his chest, grateful that he’s not the victI'm here.
“I wasn’t going that fast.”
“I’m not buying that, this guy’s not buying that and the cops aren’t gonna buy that so you might want to work on your story….. now let’s see if we can get you out.”
Appraise situation. Laugh to yourself at his sissy rims and short car frame and remain bedazzled at the fact that his car is in the bank tail end first.
“Do you have anything you can lay on the ground in front of your rear tires to give us traction?”
“No.”
Go back to Jeep and retrieve bag of potting soil. Ask him to spread half of the bag in front of each rear tire and admire the way he doesn’t seem to notice that his wingtips are getting ruined. While he’s spreading it, he says “is this potting soil?”
“Yes, cat litter also works well.” He seems truly amazed.
Have him get in driver’s seat and tell him to very gently, very slowly, see if that afforded him traction. Tell him to point his front end down hill and see if he can get the car onto the pavement. Listen to wheel’s spin out as he again pretends he’s a jackrabbit.
“Slowly!”
“That wasn’t fast.”
“Was that how slow you came up the on-ramp?” Receive high five from the other man, who still seems to be enjoying himself immensely. “Do you at least have a full tank of gas to give us some leverage?”
“No.”
“Does WalMart still have a driver’s license kiosk way in the back of the store?” Roll eyes while other man holds his gut because he’s laughing so hard.
Try rocking car, try pushing car, try pleading with car. Avoid slapping the driver upside the head while he continues to race the wheels. Realize that nothing short of a wrecker can get this dude out of this mess. Remain grateful that his racing tires never caught the pavement because we all would’ve been killed. Say a silent thank you to your father who taught you and your siblings defensive driving with a health dose of common sense and self-preservation thrown in the mix. Bid adieu to both gentlemen, walk back to Jeep, give it a fond pat for always getting you where you need to go safely and for not having sissy rims and finish the commute to work.