Feeling terrible about tetra death...

  • #1
I'm sure I accidentally killed one of my black neon tetras. Here's a separate thread about the situation so not to repeat myself.

I just feel absolutely heartbroken and guilty over this. I would never, ever, ever deliberately harm an animal, and I see my fish as my precious babies. Knowing that I was responsible for the death of one of them just makes my heart ache and I've been shedding tears all day over it. I know it's a silly thing to feel this way over a fish, but I just can't help it. I had these tetras for two years now (I started with seven, one died shortly after bringing them home, the other mysteriously vanished) and I was hoping the remaining ones would live full lives together to the end.

I also just feel bad for the remaining tetras. There's only four and I know they like having more in a group. But the thing I fear is that if I add more, the current ones (and my sassy dwarf gourami) will reject the newcomers, especially if I happened to get fish of a different species.


I killed one of my fish and I feel like an absolute failure of a fish mom.

  • #2
Terrible news, it didn't make it.

I've been crying nonstop, I feel absolutely horrible, I consider these guys my babies...

I'm so sorry sweetheart, I really thought I was helping you. I should have left you be...

I can tell the other tetras are upset, they didn't swim up to me when I fed them. They probably don't trust me anymore.

I quoted from the linked post. I'm sorry your fish didn't survive, but it didn't die because of what you did, and I doubt very much that there was anything you could have done to save it.

I also doubt very much that the other tetras are upset, or have the capacity for trust in the first place. The best thing you can do for the remaining black neon tetras is to get more of them. They will feel more secure, and have less stress, in a larger group. They won't care that the other fish are "new".
  • #3
I know how this feels I was setting up a tank I got from someone and I cleaned everything two or three times before I even set up the whole tank. Cleaned the decorations, tank, substrate, everything but when I finally got to putting my fish in the tank after it was cycled they were doing great but then I think they got columnaris and it killed off half of my fish and it was really heart breaking to me. I didnt want a aquarium anymore because I was so sad that so many of my dish died so fast. But now that I got a new bigger tank my fish are in there and happy I also did manage to save two of my silver dollars, but their tail fins are a little messed up but they are happy now and that's all that matters! so I'm super glad I didnt quit with my aquarium. Also I dont think you're a failure of a fish mom, you didnt want the fish to die. I'm so sorry it really sucks when a fish dies I hope you can get more cute little fish to brighten your spirits!
  • #4
It really, honestly, truly wasn't your fault. And I can absolutely see where you are coming from- keeping fish has helped me through some challenging times this year and I love my fish for that. Don't feel like your feelings are silly or foolish, because they are neither. You are entitled to your own feelings!

I would not worry too much about adding a couple more fish when you are ready. Aggression should not be an issue with that species and I doubt your Gourami will care too much after living with a school for that long.

Take care and try to cheer up!
  • #5
It’s ok, just take it as a lesson. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it

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