Don't ever get married. Am so stressed!

Man, getting married in 4 days and it is ALL falling on my shoulders. STRESS!

 

Congrats and Good luck!!!

 

Congratulations. Don't worry, it will get better.
Well, it will get better after it gets far worse.
It's normal to be stressed. I think that anyone who doesn't stress about their wedding isn't taking their future marriage seriously.
And don't forget, when your husbands friends ask you to come out to the parking lot with them, say "NO," unless you want to be kidnapped (not sure if that's a tradition overseas or not)
When it comes to weddings, I'm not a traditional person. The day is stressful enough that there is no reason to add to that stress by kidnapping the bride, pounding on glasses with silverware, and other stupid little things. My wife's brother very kindly informed the guests that anyone who clanked their silverware on their glass would be given the bum's rush. It almost made up for him being late.

 

Super Armadillo, believe me everything will work out. You said everything was falling on your shoulders, what are you having to do?

We just went through a wedding, my daughter, and the fact remains, when the day comes, everything will be as it should, every step will work toward the next, and before you know it the day will be over. SO, my advice is to enjoy each moment, don't let your photographer run the day. Make it simple, by that I mean choose the easiest hair style you can to not have to fuss over, that in itself will take tons of stress off the day. Have everything in its place the night before,( yeah that's right no matter how much you want to party the night before, if you get lots of rest, you will feel up to the day.
Is it going to be a big wedding, small, traditional, or like a garden wedding? We have had one in our family where my daughter was married here at home, a 160 acre homestead, and it was a garden wedding, I did the flowers, and her mother -in -law to be did the cake, we had a B-B-Q reception, and they left early in the day. The only problem was the photographer kept asking this group and that to pose.....which stressed everyone out.
The wedding this year, we used the same photographer, but we told her just which posed pictures she could take, then the rest were to be candid. Which worked MUCH better. This wedding was in a VERY small church, then we all went to a rented reception hall, once again I did the flowers but her sister did the cake, and it was great. The reception was catered, and we had about 85 guests not big, but I think it was better than the first wedding because the last thing after a big day like that is to have to clean up a mess.

I am sure by now all these arrangements are taken care of, but the day itself will go better if you rehearse the hair, makeup, and getting into your dress and all, two days early. Then you will be all set, and just enjoy the day!


April

 

Congrats!!! You'll have to post some pictures after the wedding!

 

Just keep in mind that this big day is about you and your fiance. All the other stuff is details. People are coming to see you get married, not to see if your party favors or wedding program (etc. etc. etc. ) are perfect. As long as you are married by the end of the day, it was a perfect day. A lot of it will be a blur when you look back on it, so just try to take things as they come.

Congratulations and good luck

 

Just remember, you don't have to clean up the reception at the end of the day!!!LOL

 

Thank you so much, guys. Kind of needed the old moral support. It's just that am this super duuufer organiser, and used to being the leader in all our ventures, but I need help on this one, as there's so much to do and I can't seem to be able to manage my troops into being efficient (luvvie duvvie and parents), so am always having to clean up their mess when they try to do something. Funnily enough, with all the tension and all that, I've never felt so much in love. Strange!

Just keep in mind that this big day is about you and your fiance. All the other stuff is details. People are coming to see you get married, not to see if your party favors or wedding program (etc. etc. etc. ) are perfect. As long as you are married by the end of the day, it was a perfect day. A lot of it will be a blur when you look back on it, so just try to take things as they come.

Congratulations and good luck

Thank you, Jendayi. I think I'm going to print this out and just read it if I get stressed again. You're right, you're right, you're right, you're right.

 

OMG sweetheart, the stress has finally hit!?!?! Deep breath, a large glass of wine and you will be fine!! :-* Michelle

 

remember my advice.. relax, have some fun, get married and if something goes wrong burn the video tape. just visualize yourself standing on a beach, looking at a football lying in the sand..

 

Congratulations! Don't worry about the details and enjoy- hopefully this is the only time you will have to do this.
My husband and I have been married almost 41 years We were living in Chicago(Jan 1967) and I remember the stress very well- everything had to be perfect. Three days before the wedding it started to snow. Then on the wedding day everybody was snowed in, It was the biggest snow storm chicago had had in 25 years. we still got married . some walked to the church some of us it took 3 hrs to get there
after a very sweet and special ceremony everybody bombarded us with.... SNOWBALLS! it was very memorable. I guess my point is relax and make memories
Carol

 

I wasn't thinking about making every detail perfect.. I was thinking of 3 weeks off from work! oh the JOY!!!

 

You were thinking of the time off of work?
I was thinking about ummmm... Nevermind.
Time off of work is good.
Yep, I was thinking about that too.

 

You were thinking of the time off of work?
I was thinking about ummmm... Nevermind.
Time off of work is good.
Yep, I was thinking about that too.

lol.. it was a VERY stressful job.. and nobody in the company had EVER taken a 3 week vacation - not even to go to europe. not even the president had.. but it wasn't all that was on my mind of course. ;D

 

Congratulations - have a ball and do share some pictures with us.

I do hope that you remain with us on the site as your sharing has been sooooooo great.

Hugs from Hong Kong

Elize]

 

I'm late, my internetr wasn't working properly yesterdy.
Coratulations!!! And Goodluck, Hope everything goes well and in the end you are happy!
Dont stress tooo much, lil is normal but take it easy,do one thing at atime!
Have a graaand time. Armadillo!

 

that's mI plan but on one condition ;D Callum!

 

You were thinking of the time off of work?
I was thinking about ummmm... Nevermind.
Time off of work is good.
Yep, I was thinking about that too.

3 weeks off! Wow, I took one week off.

It is just getting worse.

Fiance now announces he screwed up and there's every chance we won't get the bouquet on time.

Also, my dad asked me to drop everything yesterday, and to assign each guest to their hotel (he screwed up and so one hotel was nearly booked up by the time he confirmed with them). I spend hours making an optimised list talking various constraints into account (avoid an ex-couple from staying in the same hotel, fiance wants to stay in the same hotel as his brothers and sisters, some people want to stay an extra night, etc.) Then my dad, just drops me another list out of nowhere, in a completely new format as 'he's not IT wizzard and doesn't understand Excel' and not at all taking any constraint into account, and mentionning in passing that the hotels actually screwed up and that we are a couple of rooms short but that doesn't matter because he's sure fiance won't mind sharing with his brother.

And the day before, the civil servant announced that the ceremony will be, despite our express (and accepted) request, in Dutch, language that only 1/2 the people present will understand. He also said that it wasn't customary in Holland to have a rehearsal, so I don't even know which door am supposed to come in from...

Am really really really annoyed at everybody right now. To think I wanted a quick do in Vegas, and my parents and fiance wanted the big thing. Now I'm the one doing all the work. Grrrr. Rant rant rant.

 

maybe you should take a nap and put a sign on the door saying "wake me when the wedding is about to start.. let them deal with it.. you're the bride & should be able to relax and take it easy.

 

Yeah I agree with flbcoupl! Nothing like letting them see what its like!

 

Aha! I see where that excess stress is coming from.
I've never been to a wedding in which the wedding party is expected to get the hotels (although that may be a cultural thing, Holland vs US). That's just a bunch of extra work. It's always been the guests' responsibility to find a place to stay if they wish. I'd say hand that list right back to your dad and tell him that he messed it up, he's going to have to fix it. You've got other things going on.

Never, ever let your husband take care of anything that has a deadline, except for his tuxedo. Men can handle one deadline at a time, maybe two. Anything more than that and something will be forgotten.

Who the heck cares if it's customary? It makes sense. It's a good idea. They should be giving you a chance for a rehearsal, and they should be performing the ceremony in the language of your choice.

Anyway, everything will be fine. Even if you're carrying a bouquet from the local flower shop, even if some guests have to double up or stay down the hall from an ex, even if you walk in the wrong door and the music gets switched for Prince's Purple Rain and the service is offered only in 12th century Mandarin Chinese, your wedding will be beautiful, and that's what's important.

 

Man, getting married in 4 days and it is ALL falling on my shoulders. STRESS!

CONGRATULATIONS armadillo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
btw, u have my sympathies ;D ;D

 

Aww.....look how nice fish people are! This forum is so sweet!

Congratulations! Don't worry about the details and enjoy- hopefully this is the only time you will have to do this.
My husband and I have been married almost 41 years
Carol

Doesn't it figure that Carol would have a story like this? 41 years Now that's amazing, and should put everything in perspective for you. What happens on your wedding day might be an amusing anecdote, but by the time you hit the 41 year mark, the stress about hotel arrangements won't seem so shattering.

I personally think the stress is okay - and forgive me saying it, but since everyone stresses before their wedding, at least you seem like the type that is focusing your stress on creative problem solving.

All the best to you!

 

Aha! I see where that excess stress is coming from.
I've never been to a wedding in which the wedding party is expected to get the hotels (although that may be a cultural thing, Holland vs US). That's just a bunch of extra work. It's always been the guests' responsibility to find a place to stay if they wish. I'd say hand that list right back to your dad and tell him that he messed it up, he's going to have to fix it. You've got other things going on.

Never, ever let your husband take care of anything that has a deadline, except for his tuxedo. Men can handle one deadline at a time, maybe two. Anything more than that and something will be forgotten.

Who the heck cares if it's customary? It makes sense. It's a good idea. They should be giving you a chance for a rehearsal, and they should be performing the ceremony in the language of your choice.

Anyway, everything will be fine. Even if you're carrying a bouquet from the local flower shop, even if some guests have to double up or stay down the hall from an ex, even if you walk in the wrong door and the music gets switched for Prince's Purple Rain and the service is offered only in 12th century Mandarin Chinese, your wedding will be beautiful, and that's what's important.

Thank you! You understand. Hurray!

And you're so right about the deadlines and husbands.

 

Aww.....look how nice fish people are! This forum is so sweet!

Congratulations! Don't worry about the details and enjoy- hopefully this is the only time you will have to do this.
My husband and I have been married almost 41 years
Carol

Doesn't it figure that Carol would have a story like this? 41 years Now that's amazing, and should put everything in perspective for you. What happens on your wedding day might be an amusing anecdote, but by the time you hit the 41 year mark, the stress about hotel arrangements won't seem so shattering.

I personally think the stress is okay - and forgive me saying it, but since everyone stresses before their wedding, at least you seem like the type that is focusing your stress on creative problem solving.

All the best to you!

he he he. Everything extremely bad and extremely good in my life is anecdote material. I could do with the wedding day being on the good side, although am really quick at laughing at past disasters.

 

your wedding day will be on the good side. don't you know having oto eggs the week of your wedding is good luck on 4 planets?

 

ROFL! Haven't seen moving eyes since yesterday, though.

 

: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : <- moving eyes.

 

: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : <- moving eyes.

 

now is that any way for a bride to act? well, I guess you could stick out your tongue when you do the wedding kiss.. but that's another topic. :

 

See all those eyes? It is good luck to have forum buddies to de-stress with!

As for bouquets, they are a snap. IF you don't want to worry about it, here is what you can do with very little expense and time. Go to your local florist, buy a dozen &1/2 small roses in the color you choose, find one contrasting small flower in your wedding colors and one green you like. At a shop like (Walmart), don't know if you have these, get floral tape, and satin ribbon, wide, and rubber strong large bands. This can all be done the day before the wedding, so the flowers are fresh.

Pick off all leaves and petals that are damaged. Cut all stems 8 or 9 inches, start building a bouquet holding in one hand, all roses first, then contrasting flowers, last the greens (stems longer so they create a drape). When it is well rounded and looks like you like rubberband the stems together, all up and down the stem, and as close to the flowers as you can get with out hurting the blossoms. Cut stems all one length, 7-8 inches. Wrap well with green floral tape. Lay on a tray with moist towel under, cover lightly with a second moist towel and place in refregerator. Evening before wedding fashion a big bow of Satin ribbon, with long training ends, and fasten it to the stems with wire, or something, I used the stick pins used to attach bootiners, leaving the sharp end tucked into the stems, wrap with satin ribbon. You can fasten this with hot glue, or more stick pins or both.

This might take an hour of your time, 1 & 1/2 for purchasing and everything, but in the end the worry is off because you have something, and then if yours which was ordered comes, you just have one to throw to the bridesmaids, and you can dry yours for a keepsake!

April

 

Oooooh, clever.

Thanks for the eyes. You're looking at me from the other end of the tunnel. I can see it already, it's a good sign!

Thanks so much for taking all this time to save the day. With all our mad meandring we did in the end find a bouquet. Not the flowers I wanted but who cares. These are pretty too.

I love the idea of tying a ribbon from the wedding dress fabric. Great idea. I'll ask my mom to do that on the day (she's coming with loads of ribbons). She's even made a basket in the colour of my wedding dress for the greeting's cards.

 

if you like eyes, I can send you a sack of potatoes.

 

Congrats,wish you all the best and don't worry the stress will be over and done with once your big day arrives.

 

Congrats.
Tom

 

Thanks, guys.

 

good luck! have a great time armadillo!

 

2 more days. Aaaargh! Just had a facial, though. That was lovely. Am actually relaxed (for a few hours), until Thijs comes back from the hairdresser's with green hair and a mohawk, that is.

 

well, what if it's blue hair and a mohawk? would that be ok?