Doing a documentary on fishkeeping =)

Ok, guys! I need your help! I am doing a 3-5 minute (shotting for 5 minutes) documentary on fishkeeping for my TV Production class. I have the script writen out, but I think it could use a bit of help, espectially the intro This part of the scritp needs to stay around 3 mintes when read aloud, so don't add anything unless you take something out, as I still have 2 interveiws (questions listed below) that need to be incorperated

The intro needs to be 30 seconds, and it is, but its poorly put together... It has to ask questions that the rest of the project will answer.

That leave the body needing to be about 2 1/2 minutes long. I need as much info crammed in as possible with out over loading the simple minds of most high schoolers So it could be little bit shorter. All the info in there is what I want, but some of it, I feel, can be simplified a bit. I have been editing and re-editing this for like 3 and a half hours, so my brain is alittle fried ATM >.<

Also, I feel like there needs to be a conclusion-type paragraph at the end... Not sure what to do about that...

What ever you guys do, quote the paragraph(s) you are making changes to, and bold what you "fix" so I can see what's being done, and the places its been done to.

Interview questions:

1)What is your favorite thing about fishkeeping?
2) What is/are the most common myth(s) about fishkeeping?
3) How do you think these myths came about?
4) If you could change one thing about fishkeeping, what would it be, and why would you make this change?
5) If you could make one fish more common in the hobby, what would it be and why?
6) What do you feel is the most important thing about fishkeeping?
7) To you, how rewarding is it to see that your fish is/are healthy and happy, and is/are given the right environment?
8) How eagar are you to learn new things and keep up with new technologies?
9) If you could say one thing to new fishkeepers, what would it be?
10) Can you explain the Nitrogen cycle?

I think I will be omitting #10 because I didnt get a very good answer on that lol

I will put it in the second post, so this one isn't so long! D=

Thanks guys!

 

INTRO
The hobby of fishkeeping is sweeping not only the nation, but the entire world. Fish were frist kept in doors in by the Chinese, who started off keeping goldfish in large glass containers after years of veiwing them from above, in ponds. So what makes Fishkeeping so popluar? What are the most common fishkeeping myths, and where do they come from? What is the best way to set up an aquarium, and how do you do it? And why are some fish unnaturally colored? In the next few minutes we will explore the answers to these questions, and more.

BODY
Fishkeeping, the practice of maintaining aquatic life in a controlled environment outside of its natural habitat.

There are many types of aquariums; freshwater, planted, saltwater reefs, and even simple, bare-bottom set ups for breeding. Not only can you house fish, but invertabrats such as crayfish, crabs, snails and shirmp.

Every fish is different. Some fish need large aquariums, some cannot be housed with other fish, some have different habitat requirments, some even have different water condtions, such as hard or acidic water. One thing is for sure, though, all fish need a cycled aquarium.

The Nitrogen Cycle is the process of Ammonia, a toxin, being introduced, then broken down into Nitrites, which is also a toxin. They are then broken down into Nitrates, which are only toxic when fish are exposed to it at high levels. The only way to remove Nitrates is by doing weekly water changes, or by adding live plants, for fresh water aquariums, or live rock for saltwater aquariums.

The cycling process can be done two different ways. A fish-in cycle requries a daily minumum of a 50% water changes, and can take several times longer then a fishless cycle, often resulting in the death of many fish. The fishless cycle is done by adding a source of ammonia, like fish food, raw shrimp, or even pure ammonia, into the tank, and fish are not added until the levels of Ammonia, Nitrites and Nitrates are safe. The length of the Nitrogen Cycle depends on the size of the aquraium.

Tattooed and dyed fish are quickly becoming very popular amoung new fishkeepers. The process of doing this has been a fervently kept secret for years because of how inhumane it is, but in recent years, the nasty truth has been uncovered.
Dyed fish are dipped into a corrosive acid, stripping them of their first line of defence from diseases and infections, their slime coat. They are then dipped into a brightly colored dye that not only coats their scales, but their gills and other internal organs which could leading to organ failure.

Tattooed fish are also dipped into the corrosive acid, and are then subjuected to hundreds of needle stabs to inject the dye. The size of the needle used is the equivilent of using a pencil on a human. Not only can fish not give their concent to be tattooed, they cannot be sedated, and have been scientifiaclly proven to feel pain.

Only 15% of these fish live, but they have severly shorten life spans, and are prone to diseases and infections. As the fish matures, the colors will fade, resulting in a normal colored fish.

 

What is the theme of this? What is your central message?

 

My theme is kinda fish keeping in general, and then I picked a few topics to talk about (The Nitrogen Cycle, Tattooed and Dyed fish, and some general-ish information).

My message is more to get people to think before they buy, and not do things like put 10 goldfish in a 5 gallon tank (if you get my point?).

I guess I should have wrote down the questions I ask in my interveiws too! I'll add those to the 1st post lol

Did that help any?

 

My theme is kinda fish keeping in general, and then I picked a few topics to talk about (The Nitrogen Cycle, Tattooed and Dyed fish, and some general-ish information).

My message is more to get people to think before they buy, and not do things like put 10 goldfish in a 5 gallon tank (if you get my point?).

I guess I should have wrote down the questions I ask in my interveiws too! I'll add those to the 1st post lol

Did that help any?

Yeah. I think for such a small piece you ought to narrow your focus to one objective. If your message is to educate the public about fish husbandry, then why would you discuss tattooed and dyed fish? It doesn't mesh and detracts from your message. Worse, it steers the audience away from your message, which is NOT about ethics.

The topics you choose to talk about ought to bolster your thesis, if you will.

 

I wanted to touch on that because the stores here really seem to like to sell them lol So do you think I should get rid of that, and add in... fishkeeping myths maybe, because I ask about it in my interveiws? Do you have any sugestions?

 

The thesis (I'm a scientist, not a journalist ) I would choose, which your into kind of supports, is that fishkeeping has taken some massive evolutionary steps as of late, and I would choose 3 things to talk about that support this. Then my conclusion would be about how these changes have an impact on your audience and what it means for them.

 

I agree with Jaysee. You really need to pick one central topic and then narrow your focus to a few specific points within that topic. If you don't, your message will be completely disjointed and will not make much sense. You'll leave your audience feeling like they didn't get much out of your presentation and that you just kind of threw it together (even though it sounds like you're putting a lot of effort into it).

 

Sorry, but your interview questions are weak. What I mean is that they don't really jive with the message you want to send. Perhaps in the answers are bit you can use to highlight your points. Who did you interview?

The basic purpose of this is to influence people. TV is ALLLLLL about influencing the audience. Editers pick and choose what things to show, in what order to show them, and they do it for a reason. You have to think along those lines.



The reason you are having trouble with a conclusion is because the body doesn't lead to one. The intro sets up the body, which builds to the conclusion. The conclusion is the easiest part to do, as all you need to do is repeat your intro, touch on the points you made and then connect the dots to the conclusion you want the audience to have.

 

I agree with Jaysee. You really need to pick one central topic and then narrow your focus to a few specific points within that topic. If you don't, your message will be completely disjointed and will not make much sense. You'll leave your audience feeling like they didn't get much out of your presentation and that you just kind of threw it together (even though it sounds like you're putting a lot of effort into it).

I might be putting too much effort into it LOL (I do that a lot XD)

Also, I think the reason it sounds really disjointed and out of order and what not, is that I'm not sure where the interveiws will go yet, or if I will have them all in one spot, or broken up. Since I don't have any access to what I've filmed when I'm at home, its hard to know how its going to be put together....

 

I would break up the interviews and only use the parts that make your case.

 

Sorry, but your interview questions are weak. What I mean is that they don't really jive with the message you want to send. Perhaps in the answers are bit you can use to highlight your points. Who did you interview?

I agree they are, but I was planning on interviewing my LFSs owner, but learned he was camera shy, so I had to do new ones D=

Instead, I talked to a friend who had Saltwater tanks in high school, and I got her into FW, with a Betta, and another friends dad who has over 500 gallons worth of Saltwater tanks, most of the reef tanks.

Got great answers from both of them, so it makes up for the suckishness of the questions lol

The basic purpose of this is to influence people. TV is ALLLLLL about influencing the audience. Editers pick and choose what things to show, in what order to show them, and they do it for a reason. You have to think along those lines.

I'm trying to. As I said, I don't have access to my videos right now, so I wrote this all down with out it, just trying to get a general idea of where to start, knowing most of what I have. That's what I get for not doing it at school XD

I would break up the interviews and only use the parts that make your case.

That's what I was thinking. Like maybe using each question (whchiever ones I use) as a new section, so to speak? Like when I asked one person about his favorite part of fishkeeping, he said learning about his corals, and I could go a bit into differnt types of corals with video to suport it and what not... (now that I typed that out, that's not really what I ment... I hope you get what I'm trying to say though XD)

 

What is the final product going to be?

You said it had to be 3 minutes long?

 

Here's a question for you, though.

Is your focus saltwater fishkeeping or freshwater fishkeeping? I ask this because different aspects of each division of the hobby are going to bring you often completely different answers. I can attest to this from having both types of tank (saltwater and freshwater). There are things that appeal to me about my freshwater tanks that I find "meh" about my freshwater tank and vice versa. Also, do you want to educate your audience for both parts of the hobby or just a broad overview. If you want a broad overview, I'm afraid you're not going to get that because your interviewees were mainly saltwater enthusiasts, so their focus is going to be saltwater (even your friend who has both saltwater tanks and a freshwater tank is going to focus on just one or the other, not both, unless you guide her into talking about both).

 

What is the final product going to be?

You said it had to be 3 minutes long?

The project needs to be 3-5 minutes long (guess I forgot to add that too! whoops :whistling, and I think the interviews will be cut to fit into two minutes (if all goes to plan!), so the body and intro cannot be more then 3 minutes long, as I was shooting to use the whole 5 minutes as I can't ever seem to rap anything up in 3 XD

Here's a question for you, though.

Is your focus saltwater fishkeeping or freshwater fishkeeping? I ask this because different aspects of each division of the hobby are going to bring you often completely different answers. I can attest to this from having both types of tank (saltwater and freshwater). There are things that appeal to me about my freshwater tanks that I find "meh" about my freshwater tank and vice versa. Also, do you want to educate your audience for both parts of the hobby or just a broad overview. If you want a broad overview, I'm afraid you're not going to get that because your interviewees were mainly saltwater enthusiasts, so their focus is going to be saltwater (even your friend who has both saltwater tanks and a freshwater tank is going to focus on just one or the other, not both, unless you guide her into talking about both).

I had planned to do all fresh water, but my other fresh water interview chickened out (the LFS owner) so I had to go for my friends dad, who keeps only SW. I don't know anyone else to go one way or the other, so I had to do both sides. I have enough vidoe to make it work nicely, and I got an AWESOME camera from my teacher. I have almost an hour of fish, plants and corals filmed LOL So you do get the "best of both worlds" so to speak.

 

Okay, is this going to be in video form, with you as the narrator and interviewer?

 

Okay, is this going to be in video form, with you as the narrator and interviewer?

yep ^.^