I think it's important to not get down on yourself for feeling bad though. I agree with you, but you also can't put so much on yourself thinking how people have it worse just to make yourself feel more bad, if that makes sense.
But anyway WOW. Wow just wow, I'm so sorry you've had to go through all of that but I'm also in awe of you. That would take a lot of strength
Opening up can be so hard. My parents practically forced me to tell them what was wrong. I don't know if I would have told them otherwise, so I'm glad they did.
Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry for what you went through. Yes, thinking about my blessings is what keeps me going a lot of the time Thank you for sharing your story, and I wish you the best
I was more meaning for other people who are struggling, they should be aware that there are others worse off but shouldn't make themselves feel worse for feeling bad. Lol not sure if I'm making sense. But I'm glad you are doing well and feeling blessed! Go you!!I don't feel bad, actually I feel extremely blessed. I should have a feeding tube in, or at least several doctors have wanted to put one in. I'll end up having at least one or two more surgeries in the future. The only good thing if you can call it good is the VA has service connected my cancer. The strength actually comes from being competitive, I hate loosing to a challenge.
It's all good, we all have obstacles in our life to overcome. Sometimes its best to talk about them.
HI Penguin02!
Just wanted to say that I can totally relate to you. I suffered from depression for a quite a long time, and it's an awful thing to experience. I opened up to my parents about it and unfortunately they weren't understanding at all in the beginning. I didn't understand myself either, because I felt like I had everything I needed in the world. And yet I felt so...stuck? Like I was losing my will to live. It's a pretty hard thing to describe.
Long story short, it became pretty severe and I was forced to enroll in Cognitive Behavior Therapy. I was anxious about it at first, but I can tell you that therapy DOES help. They are totally non judgmental, completely understanding, and offer great tips on how to deal with mental illness. And you can go any time you want! I started attending twice a week, and slowly brought it down to once a week, then once a month, and now I rarely attend at all. I relapse occasionally but I can always phone up my therapist and ask for some extra help.
Opening up is hard but it never hurts to visit a mental health professional. I regret not taking therapy earlier. But anyways, I hope you find what works for you, and get well soon! I am here to talk at any time, if you ever need anyone.
You are not alone. Many people, including myself, suffer from various degrees of depression. I have been struggling with depression for over 18 years (half of my life) and I know what you mean and how you feel.
When we start recognizing the symptons of depression it is logical to think like you do and feel guilty, after all, like you said, you have a home, a loving family, everything you need to thrive and others have it worst than you... Let me tell you, Don't Feel Guilty. Depression is not based on external sources, that would be sadness or disappointment or the like. Depression is mostly internal and like any other illness/condition you can't just make it go away by positive thinking; It may help in some cases, but it should be taken seriously , checked, diagnosed and treated just like any other condition. So again, do not feel guilty for feeling depressed, sad or down, even when you think there is no reason for it, don't feel bad for not wanting to meet with your friends or doing what you used to enjoy. It is all part of it, BUT you CAN overcome it. Once you understand that what you are going through is a result of the depression you can make conscious decisions to not let it beat you up. You can get up and fight it, by doing things you don't feel like doing (even if it may feel like it is against your will at the time). HOWEVER, if sometimes you decide to not do those things, if you are too tired to go out, meet with friends or do things you used to enjoy, then don't do them, it is OK too, AS LONG AS you understand that it is part of the condition, that it is temporary and as long as you don't feel guilty about it. Don't feel you are a bad friend, don't feel you are being selfish, you are not.
Knowledge is power. There is a lot of information online. If you google what you are feeling, you will realize you are not the only one, you are not alone.
The most important things I want you to know are:
• YOU ARE STRONG. Don't think you are weak, people living with depression are the strongest people I know.
• YOU ARE LOVED. Depression can be tricky and make you feel unloved or unworthy. Not true. People all around you love you and care for you.
You have the option to keep this to yourself or be open about it. You can tell your friends and family or you can keep it private with only those closest to you. I kept it to myself for the longest time because I was afraid of being labeled or misunderstood, seen as weak, but it was really hard. I had to pretend I was always happy, I had to hide my feelings, I had to come with excuses for not wanting to do things... It was like living a double life. It felt like being imprisoned. I then decided to open up to the people I love, family and close friends and let me tell you, it freed me up. I don't have to hide anymore, I can be myself, I can be honest and I feel the support from them. It is so much better. Now it doesn't mean that everybody has to know. Depression is NOT what defines you. For example, I don't talk about it at work or with people that are not close to me.
I am glad you are in this hobby. It has worked wonders for me. Looking at my tanks give me peace, it ha a relaxing effect. I hope it does the same for you.
Here are some links
• 8 Things People With Hidden Depression Do
• 13 Things To Remember When You Love A Person Who Has Depression
• 23 Things Only People Who Love Spending Time Alone Will Understand
Wishing you the best'
Joe
Thank you so much, Joe. It's scary trying to deal with my mental health, and hearing stories from people like you make it a lot less intimidating.
I agree, aquariums are a huge help. It gives me a weekly responsibility and it's nice knowing that something depends on me. Plus, my new ideas and projects are good things to look forward to.
So I'm very new here and this seems weird to lay it all out, but the truth sets you free right? I have delt with depression for about 15 years (started in high school). I ended up a **** addict for the better part of my 20s to attempt to turn off my brain and it's non stop negativity. I have now been clean for about 5 years now and have my own family, career, house ect. But the negativity still creeps in a lot of the time even when everything around me is good.
Now, I'm not sure this helps anyone but me, but when I get anxiety or feel down I just bury myself in something that interests me. My no means should this be the only thing you do because therapy and what not are probably good to do in conjunction, just not what I do. I have had a million hobbies and learned a million new things over the years just by diving head first and keeping myself busy. The aquarium hobby started to keep me occupied and has been a huge help in brightening my days.
Just keep your head up and find things that keep your brain moving because silence only makes depression louder.
I had a very rough time in high school (not how you'd imagine) and that has resulted in lots of issues including depression & a few suicide attempts. I understand (sort of) what you're going through. PM me 24/7.
Hey! I completely understand how you feel! I have felt that way at times but something that works for me is always praying and reading the bible! different things work for different people and this is something that always helps me! there is a bible verse that I love and its Isaiah 41:10 and it says:
"So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
This verse has helped me through a lot! hope it helps you as well.
and its very brave of you to share your story with all of us.
I've been very depressed for over a year after a series of losses within my family + my gf left me. Everyone learns how to deal with it in their own way. For me it was rapping, writing songs and trying to hang out with friends even if I didn't want to. Only problem is I feel like depression never truly goes away and every time something goes wrong in life you just feel yourself getting sucked in again in that black hole of hopelessness and the feeling of everything what am I doing all this for. Those feelings come and luckily also go eventually. Stay strong my friend.