Building A Moat?

My neighbor behind me is driving me nuts. For some reason they think my backyard is their backyard. 150 feet of it borders my yard. What would it take to build a moat and stock it with piranhas? I'm feeling spiteful so at this point I will sink a bunch of money into this. Also I have a backhoe so I can go 7 feet deep if needed.

 

Try building a fence first and lining it with barbed wire then we can talk about more extreme measures. Those extreme measures I (not expert just googled)would dig down 3 feet and across 4 feet maybe line with concrete(?) add sand on bottom add plants check parameters add fish feed. Maybe small gator pond(?) if that doesn’t work

 

I’m all for crocs or gators! Love both. Faster than piranha too. Plus they can wander around the property and take care of any stragglers.

 

I need a permit for gators. Lol. I looked into a fence with guard towers but that's really expensive and needs to be 20 feet from the property line. A lined trench with goldfish would probably be enough but piranhas would be cooler. I have been looking into the propane heaters for pools.

 

Have you considered other animals besides fish?

 

I need a permit for gators. Lol. I looked into a fence with guard towers but that's really expensive and needs to be 20 feet from the property line. A lined trench with goldfish would probably be enough but piranhas would be cooler. I have been looking into the propane heaters for pools.

I know my sarassas would make short work of them! But you’re right, the piranhas would be totally cool!

Have you considered other animals besides fish?

Hmmmm... a boat load of fire ants? I’ve got plenty!

 

Oh a hive of wasps a lot of them

 

Oh a hive of wasps a lot of them

Haven’t got a lot of wasps yet. Hornets ok? Have three huge nests we need to get rid of!

 

Never mind I got it now

 

Keep in mind the straw that broke the camels back was Wednesday when my jack russel that was on a chain in my front yard got a hold of one of his chickens in my front yard and he called the state police. Today his children broke my window with a football since he doesn't want them playing close to his house. But close to mine I guess is ok.

 

Maybe fence.hornets/wasps and plant poison ivy with croc moat

 

maybe make a pond full of salmon. Then step two, get a grizzly bear. Step three, get the neighbors to go fishing in your pond. Step four, alert the bear that your neighbors are stealing his lunch. Step 5, bear chases neighbors and then they never leave the house ever again. Step 6, make the bear go live on the neighbors property so you don't get in trouble for illegally owning a wild animal.

 

Now. Now be realistic where would you even get a grizzly

 

The bear part is easy. Lol. Last fall one tore into his chicken fence and ate all 8 of his chickens. We put all our scraps out for him as well as the neighbor behind him. He keeps calling the game commission and they basically laugh at him. We live in the middle of the largest state game lands in Pennsylvania what does he expect would happen.

 

Oh ok that’s realistic then I suggest a grizzly and a grizzly cub as the grizzlys are really protective of cubs

 

Unfortunately we don't have grizzly bears. I'm just at my wits ends with them. Last year I was fixing my drain field for my septic, within 2 days the township was knocking on my door and I had to replace my whole system. He has accused me of giving his kid asthma since my chimney is at the back of my house, which he also burned wood to heat his house so since asthma doesn't work that way its truly an insult. If I do anything on the outside of my house he calls the township to see if I have gotten a permit. Originally he got a mortgage for the house but failed in life so his dad took over the mortgage and now its in his dads name so he is simply a renter. I only know he calls the township since I used to work with the township supervisor and he calls me so we can have a good laugh.

 

Unfortunately we don't have grizzly bears. I'm just at my wits ends with them. Last year I was fixing my drain field for my septic, within 2 days the township was knocking on my door and I had to replace my whole system. He has accused me of giving his kid asthma since my chimney is at the back of my house, which he also burned wood to heat his house so since asthma doesn't work that way its truly an insult. If I do anything on the outside of my house he calls the township to see if I have gotten a permit. Originally he got a mortgage for the house but failed in life so his dad took over the mortgage and now its in his dads name so he is simply a renter. I only know he calls the township since I used to work with the township supervisor and he calls me so we can have a good laugh.

Ok. This dude is over the hill nuts! Have a few of them myself. My neighbor's dog killed their own chicken in my back yard and called the police on me for cruelty to animals. Luckily I know the sheriff and he called the neighbor crazy. Then fined them for animals at large. They finally moved.
If they hadn’t, I’m afraid the most thing would be a working idea. I’m sorry you’ve got to put up with this. Oh, and I have severe asthma. It came with my genes. They’re idiots! Get some bee hives. Lots n lots of bee hives!

 

Love the idea of bee hives but my daughter swells up like a balloon if she gets stung so id like to stay away from that. Lol. Currently neither of them have jobs so I guess they haven't anything better to do. If they quit doing drugs atleast one of them could have a job but since that's more important neither have a job very long. Iys sad child protective services has taken their kids twice but they get them back. So is it wrong to wish to wish that both would od?

 

Crazy neighbors suck. Serious advice:

Put up no trespassing signs. (Without any threats in them. )

Install cameras in places that will document incidents, also at the most common points of tresspass.

Document every trespass: date, time, brief, unemotional language.

Have a cease and desist letter drafted by a lawyer, and sent certified mail.

If your neighbor or animals cause property damage, file police reports. If the damage is worth the trouble, take him to small claims court.

Don't let him steamroll you.

(Your insurance company would probably frown upon a moat due to liability, but good fences do make for better neighbors . Just be sure to get a survey done first, so it is definitely on your side of the property line.)

 

the problem with a fence is it has to be 20 feet from the property line and my backyard is only 15 feet so a fence would have to be further than my house is. I can legally have a fish pond up to the property line as there is no ordnance for that. They have cost me $5000 at this point so another $2-3 thousand is not out of range.

 

Love the idea of bee hives but my daughter swells up like a balloon if she gets stung so id like to stay away from that. Lol. Currently neither of them have jobs so I guess they haven't anything better to do. If they quit doing drugs atleast one of them could have a job but since that's more important neither have a job very long. Iys sad child protective services has taken their kids twice but they get them back. So is it wrong to wish to wish that both would od?

I’ve got to say that’s very wrong and I expect better from you. Run over by a flail mower sounds much more the thing. Or a sheetfoot from the toes up. Lousy parents need creativity. OD is just too quiet for them. (Sorry, my evil side is out tonight)

Crazy neighbors suck. Serious advice:

Put up no trespassing signs. (Without any threats in them. )

Install cameras in places that will document incidents, also at the most common points of tresspass.

Document every trespass: date, time, brief, unemotional language.

Have a cease and desist letter drafted by a lawyer, and sent certified mail.

If your neighbor or animals cause property damage, file police reports. If the damage is worth the trouble, take him to small claims court.

Don't let him steamroll you.

(Your insurance company would probably frown upon a moat due to liability, but good fences do make for better neighbors . Just be sure to get a survey done first, so it is definitely on your side of the property line.)

Well if we’re going to be all reasonable and stuff. All of the above is true.

 

I may be missing something.... but why not just build a fence out of hedges??

Edit: a fence called a large pond with koi. Pretty to look at..

 

I would be worried that a pond like that would be a major insurance liability, like an unfenced swimming pool.

I would put the money into surveillance equipment.

 

I would be worried that a pond like that would be a major insurance liability, like an unfenced swimming pool.

I would put the money into surveillance equipment.

Just too reasonable! And game cameras are fairly inexpensive. We’ve got them everywhere. Some take just pics, others video and sound. Just a thought.

 

Fish ponds were added to my homeowners policy when I bought the house because I added all my tanks that I had when I bought the house and a fish pond was included so I still have coverage for a pond. I probably should call them on monday since I don't have a big dog anymore (germal shepard) anymore. I'm also thinking about the extra for a wood stove since I went to a coal stoker 2 years ago. Lol. I'm thinking they owe me money.

 

Its pretty sad iv thougt of parking my diesel truck in my backyard yard and firing it up at 5 am and holding it a half throttle for half an hour to wake the neighborhood to just be annoying. My other neighbors don't have a problem with it, I asked them if my straight piped 6.0 was a problem and they said that they loved when this neighbor complained that I started it at 7 am to go to work that they had to hold in their laughter at them.

 

I remembered last night, that according to a tv show I once watched, an open moat is called a "haw haw" and its function was to keep out peasants. So there is that.

 

If you build a moat, they will probably go fishing in it. I had a neighbor who had a small area of grass behind my property that he refused to maintain. I went away for a weekend and came back to find that the grass had been burned down in my absence. This was less than 20 feet from my house. I had to call the township fire department, as there was also a no burn order in effect due to drought!

Fortunately, he recently sold the house and the new owner seems to be a nice guy, though his Vietnamese pot belly has a bad habit of wandering around sometimes! Anybody want some ham and bacon? (kidding, she's a sweet little pig.)

 

I agree with surveillance... and poison ivy. Poison oak would work too. By any chance, do you happen to be immune to poison ivy? It's technically just a very common allergy, and some people (myself included) don't have that allergy. I think it actually looks kind of nice, so I just let it grow. But seriously, poison ivy because kids hate it so much, and if you plant some and you're fast about it you'll have time to wash off the oil before it irritates you.

 

Its pretty sad iv thougt of parking my diesel truck in my backyard yard and firing it up at 5 am and holding it a half throttle for half an hour to wake the neighborhood to just be annoying. My other neighbors don't have a problem with it, I asked them if my straight piped 6.0 was a problem and they said that they loved when this neighbor complained that I started it at 7 am to go to work that they had to hold in their laughter at them.

hahah PREPARE TO SNORKEL!!!

 

I agree with surveillance... and poison ivy. Poison oak would work too. By any chance, do you happen to be immune to poison ivy? It's technically just a very common allergy, and some people (myself included) don't have that allergy. I think it actually looks kind of nice, so I just let it grow. But seriously, poison ivy because kids hate it so much, and if you plant some and you're fast about it you'll have time to wash off the oil before it irritates you.

Poison ivy is beautiful. Has gorgeous purple flowers. The hairy vines climbing a tree are even pretty. We have one oak tree with a very old vine. The leaves are huge! I’ll try to get pics this year. I’m unfortunately one of those people allergic. One touch and it gets into my bloodstream. But it’s so pretty!

 

Personally.... I'd go with a defensible living fence out of Osage Orange. If I'm not TOTALLY mistaken I believe General George Washington used this annnnnd I want to say Honey Locust on his own ranch/farm type property. Possibly even Mt. Vernon. I know for certain Osage Orange has some good sized thorns, and whether it's Honey Locust or not, whatever the second tree Gen Washington used actually had longer thorns than the Osage. Here are two articles to get you started

.Living Fences: How-To, Advantages, and Tips | MOTHER EARTH NEWS

https://myfarmlife.com/home-garden/bull-strong-hog-tight/

As useful as concertina wire is I'm not a fan. It's to high maintenance and I've got to much personal experience. Also... I concur with Maggie thecat. Surveillance, lots of photographic and video surveillance and documentation.

 

Oooh, I like the locust idea. Long sharp thorns with just enough toxin to sting for a while. Will yucca grow in PA?

 

You need a PA system that has a message saying "warning this is a restricted area, the use of deadly force is authorized by the commanding officer "

 

That might work. Lol.

 

How big is this moat planned to be? The whole 150 feet where the two properties border each other?