FishMich
- #1
I don’t know, I think I’ve bitten off more than I can chew. This is going to be long. It’s been giving me anxiety and I just need to get it off my chest. Just a fair warning to anyone opening this post!
We got into keeping fish last fall because my five year old is my world and his world is all about fish. He loves fish. My parents came to visit and decided to get him a tank and some fish as a present.
I found this first tank very stressful in the beginning. I didn’t know about fishless cycling beforehand, and had to do a fish in cycle. The incessant testing and frequent water changes and constant worry that I was harming the fish, plus butting heads with my husband about how much money and time to spend on the fish. Plus, I got very ill about a month after we got the tank. Was in hospital for a spell. Took months to finally cycle the tank (had great help along the way from members here, so thankful for that).
Once it was cycled and my health improved slightly, I enjoyed the tank. But then we went away, came back and realized two of our neons had possibly Neon Tetra Disease. Seeing living things suffer and die gives me a lot of axiety. In the end my husband euthanized them, after talking to the LFS and researching online. They had been deteriorating and medications didn’t seem to work, and if it really was NTD like the LFS suggested, then there was no cure and they were just suffering. Now every time we leave for more than a day, I actually refuse to look at the tank first, I get my husband or son to account for all the fish before I’ll even look. So, that’s one red flag that I think says I’m not cut out for this. Fish are delicate and the small fish we want to keep don’t have long life spans. I feel like I’m just constantly worried about their health, it’s taking away from me actually enjoying them.
Anyways, my son’s enthusiasm for fish, well I guess that made me and my husband want to get excited about it with him. We bought a brand new 10 gallon kit. Then hubby scoured the local buy and sells and we bought four more small-mid sized tanks. THEN he found a 90 gallon tank and stand, so we jumped on that too. Then we thought about buying a new filter for that 90 gallon, spent several hundred dollars on that. Honestly, on the 90 gallon set up alone we’ve probably spent around $1000? We don’t really have a lot of extra money, so now I’ve got anxiety about that, buyer’s remorse maybe?
Well, in the middle of all this, I had a bad fall while snowboarding and I got a concussion. For a month now, I’ve been in a lot of pain and nausea and vomiting, all day and night. It’s been almost unbearable, I’ve barely been able to keep up maintenance on the one 12 gallon tank that actually has fish in it. This week, hubby had to do the tank clean and water change for the first time, because the pain and sickness didn’t ease up all week so I couldn’t get to it. Which led me to think, what have I done?! How the heck am I going to manage this tank, the 10 gallon and the 90?! (Let’s ignore the two 10 gallons, the 29 gallon and a 34 gallon in the garage for now. Those are empty. The 12 gallon has fish, and the 10 gallon and 90 gallon I’m attempting to do a fishless cycle).
And I guess while I’ve been up in the wee hours of the night in pain, I’ve also done a lot of thinking. Before my son, I honestly (please don’t be mad, I want to be honest here) didn’t ever really like fish! They creeped me out when I was a kid because they don’t have eyelids, I don’t ever want to touch the scales on a fish, yep, that creeps me out too, and as a child, I also never wanted to keep one because I thought they died really easily.
I don’t know what happened. I thought I enjoyed this hobby and fish, but maybe because I’m not healthy at the moment, I find it overwhelming? Maybe once I get passed this concussion, I’ll enjoy it again? Or perhaps, I was just forcing myself to like it because it brings so much joy to my five year old. Maybe I should just sell the 90 gallon and all the brand new equipment (I don’t think I can return stuff, the tank has been running trying to do a fishless cycle) and cut our losses now. Keep the 12 gallon going and let my son add a betta to the 10 gallon and leave it at that?
I’m sorry, I know this was long. I just needed to get it out there. I’m not sure what to do! I thought writing it all out here would help ease my anxiety but it hasn’t yet. I don’t think I’m cut out for this!
We got into keeping fish last fall because my five year old is my world and his world is all about fish. He loves fish. My parents came to visit and decided to get him a tank and some fish as a present.
I found this first tank very stressful in the beginning. I didn’t know about fishless cycling beforehand, and had to do a fish in cycle. The incessant testing and frequent water changes and constant worry that I was harming the fish, plus butting heads with my husband about how much money and time to spend on the fish. Plus, I got very ill about a month after we got the tank. Was in hospital for a spell. Took months to finally cycle the tank (had great help along the way from members here, so thankful for that).
Once it was cycled and my health improved slightly, I enjoyed the tank. But then we went away, came back and realized two of our neons had possibly Neon Tetra Disease. Seeing living things suffer and die gives me a lot of axiety. In the end my husband euthanized them, after talking to the LFS and researching online. They had been deteriorating and medications didn’t seem to work, and if it really was NTD like the LFS suggested, then there was no cure and they were just suffering. Now every time we leave for more than a day, I actually refuse to look at the tank first, I get my husband or son to account for all the fish before I’ll even look. So, that’s one red flag that I think says I’m not cut out for this. Fish are delicate and the small fish we want to keep don’t have long life spans. I feel like I’m just constantly worried about their health, it’s taking away from me actually enjoying them.
Anyways, my son’s enthusiasm for fish, well I guess that made me and my husband want to get excited about it with him. We bought a brand new 10 gallon kit. Then hubby scoured the local buy and sells and we bought four more small-mid sized tanks. THEN he found a 90 gallon tank and stand, so we jumped on that too. Then we thought about buying a new filter for that 90 gallon, spent several hundred dollars on that. Honestly, on the 90 gallon set up alone we’ve probably spent around $1000? We don’t really have a lot of extra money, so now I’ve got anxiety about that, buyer’s remorse maybe?
Well, in the middle of all this, I had a bad fall while snowboarding and I got a concussion. For a month now, I’ve been in a lot of pain and nausea and vomiting, all day and night. It’s been almost unbearable, I’ve barely been able to keep up maintenance on the one 12 gallon tank that actually has fish in it. This week, hubby had to do the tank clean and water change for the first time, because the pain and sickness didn’t ease up all week so I couldn’t get to it. Which led me to think, what have I done?! How the heck am I going to manage this tank, the 10 gallon and the 90?! (Let’s ignore the two 10 gallons, the 29 gallon and a 34 gallon in the garage for now. Those are empty. The 12 gallon has fish, and the 10 gallon and 90 gallon I’m attempting to do a fishless cycle).
And I guess while I’ve been up in the wee hours of the night in pain, I’ve also done a lot of thinking. Before my son, I honestly (please don’t be mad, I want to be honest here) didn’t ever really like fish! They creeped me out when I was a kid because they don’t have eyelids, I don’t ever want to touch the scales on a fish, yep, that creeps me out too, and as a child, I also never wanted to keep one because I thought they died really easily.
I don’t know what happened. I thought I enjoyed this hobby and fish, but maybe because I’m not healthy at the moment, I find it overwhelming? Maybe once I get passed this concussion, I’ll enjoy it again? Or perhaps, I was just forcing myself to like it because it brings so much joy to my five year old. Maybe I should just sell the 90 gallon and all the brand new equipment (I don’t think I can return stuff, the tank has been running trying to do a fishless cycle) and cut our losses now. Keep the 12 gallon going and let my son add a betta to the 10 gallon and leave it at that?
I’m sorry, I know this was long. I just needed to get it out there. I’m not sure what to do! I thought writing it all out here would help ease my anxiety but it hasn’t yet. I don’t think I’m cut out for this!