A long heartfelt rant - People can be mean :(

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how bad I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

 

Hey, everybody has different preferences when it comes to pets. At least you aren't ignorant about trying to understand where the other is coming from. It sounds like she didn't bother to understand the care of fish at all, when we really do a lot to care for our fish friends. I bet every single person that I talk to about my fish don't understand how much work goes into maintain aquariums. They just assume I feed daily and change the water every month or so. And not everyone is willing to have tattoos of their pets (I'm probably not alone with this one). Anyways, know that practically everyone here understands how much it takes to take care of fish, as well as how much our fish mean to us. Don't get down on yourself because someone is insensitive on something you care about

 

Hey, everybody has different preferences when it comes to pets. At least you aren't ignorant about trying to understand where the other is coming from. It sounds like she didn't bother to understand the care of fish at all, when we really do a lot to care for our fish friends. I bet every single person that I talk to about my fish don't understand how much work goes into maintain aquariums. They just assume I feed daily and change the water every month or so. And not everyone is willing to have tattoos of their pets (I'm probably not alone with this one). Anyways, know that practically everyone here understands how much it takes to take care of fish, as well as how much our fish mean to us. Don't get down on yourself because someone is insensitive on something you care about

I appreciate you reading and responding way more than you know, so thank you. I was surprised how much it hurt me and still is, I just knew I had to come on here to get those who understand about our fish give me a pick me up Thank you!

 

I appreciate you reading and responding way more than you know, so thank you. I was surprised how much it hurt me and still is, I just knew I had to come on here to get those who understand about our fish give me a pick me up Thank you!

Of course! I'm one of those people that gets insecure about other people's comments and opinions about me (but not showing it), so I think I understand where you're coming from a bit. Just know that you shouldn't feel bad about someone else's opinion about a hobby. Trust me, I know it's easier said then done, but just keep reminding yourself that and it'll get better!

 

Of course! I'm one of those people that gets insecure about other people's comments and opinions about me (but not showing it), so I think I understand where you're coming from a bit. Just know that you shouldn't feel bad about someone else's opinion about a hobby. Trust me, I know it's easier said then done, but just keep reminding yourself that and it'll get better!

Thank you my friend, believe me when it’s 1AM and you’re sitting in bed revisiting this, these words help!

 

It seems in recent years some people treat dogs as if they were children, instead of a hunting companion, task or security animal.
I'm not a big fan of Tattoos, its a generational thing, but IMO, tattooing the image of a dead dog on ones body isn't a very smart move.
Keeping fish is to experience living art. A successful fishkeeper is more like a marine park curator rather than a simple pet owner.
Life is too short, don't sweat the small stuff.

 

It seems in recent years some people treat dogs as if they were children, instead of a hunting companion, task or security animal.
I'm not a big fan of Tattoos, its a generational thing, but IMO, tattooing the image of a dead dog on ones body isn't a very smart move.
Keeping fish is to experience living art. A successful fishkeeper is more like a marine park curator rather than a simple pet owner.
Life is too short, don't sweat the small stuff.

I’m glad others agree with me, because I, like others, can say I put my heart and soul into keeping, raising and enjoying my fish. I mean I see them all day everyday, especially during lockdown and they are in my bedroom!

Thank you for your kind words buddy

 

I know just how hard it is to deal with people who don't love animals as much as I do. I never thought I'd ever be attached to a fish as marine animals just were never my "thing", but you really do get attached when you own one! I started almost a year ago now (wow, time flies) and when I got my very first fish, I couldn't stop talking about them. Everyone told me I was crazy, they're just fish, whatever else. It was worse when I had to euthanize multiple fish from Petco (wow, one disease can really get out of hand) in a short time frame and I'd grown to love them. "Just dump them down the drain, they're $2 at Petco", or "I can't believe your crying over a stupid fish". I took to this forum to find people I could actually talk to about fish because I couldn't talk to anyone else.

As a vet tech, I love all animals, big and small. Sometimes you even find people who don't like a dog, or a cat! OR they go so far as to purposely try to hit an animal in the road! (I don't associate with those types). It is frustrating, but you just need to find your people. For fish, it's Fishlore

 

I know just how hard it is to deal with people who don't love animals as much as I do. I never thought I'd ever be attached to a fish as marine animals just were never my "thing", but you really do get attached when you own one! I started almost a year ago now (wow, time flies) and when I got my very first fish, I couldn't stop talking about them. Everyone told me I was crazy, they're just fish, whatever else. It was worse when I had to euthanize multiple fish from Petco (wow, one disease can really get out of hand) in a short time frame and I'd grown to love them. "Just dump them down the drain, they're $2 at Petco", or "I can't believe your crying over a stupid fish". I took to this forum to find people I could actually talk to about fish because I couldn't talk to anyone else.

As a vet tech, I love all animals, big and small. Sometimes you even find people who don't like a dog, or a cat! OR they go so far as to purposely try to hit an animal in the road! (I don't associate with those types). It is frustrating, but you just need to find your people. For fish, it's Fishlore

Right! I had no idea I cared this much for my fish, let alone my new fish which haven’t arrived yet! It’s totally changed my perceptive and appreciation of fish, but also animals-Heck I’ve been vegetarian just before I stocked my first tank! I’m glad I have this community to confide and understand in. My missus is trying her best but hey, there’s nothing like the comfort of words from a fellow keeper

I thank you for taking your time to console me my friend, much appreciated.

 

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how **** I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

I feel you. My brother is a dog enthusiast. He thinks fish are lame. I tried to explain how wrong it is to put a 12 inch goldfish in a bowl. I explained how it’s burning the fish’s gills and suffocating it from ammonia. I also explained how bettas in cups at petsmart is the equivalent to a puppy farm (seriously, it is), his words were (of course) “it’s different cause it’s just a fish“

He irritates me.

 

I feel you. My brother is a dog enthusiast. He thinks fish are lame. I tried to explain how wrong it is to put a 12 inch goldfish in a bowl. I explained how it’s burning the fish’s gills and suffocating it from ammonia. I also explained how bettas in cups at petsmart is the equivalent to a puppy farm (seriously, it is), his words were (of course) “it’s different cause it’s just a fish“

He irritates me.

Nothing hurts more than the appreciation of one animal but not the other!

 

Nothing hurts more than the appreciation of one animal but not the other!

Yeah. To him, fish are just decor. If a fish suffers for days and slowly dies of ammonia poison, he won’t give a fig. His plan for a fish tank is a 100 trout tank/pond, and when I said 100 gallons is to small for trout, he said he would make a super powerful current so it was like the fish were in more water then they were, and when I said it didn’t work that way, he ignored me.

Luckily, he doesn’t really have any interest in fish, so he will probably never do anything like that (I hope...).

 

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

IMO a fish tattoo would look wayyyy cooler than a dog tattoo. Also this mentality she seems to have is really dumb lol. If she got a tattoo of her dog to justify how much she loved it, than she should tattoo a picture of her mom, dad, or whoever she says she loves as well and if she doesn’t, that must mean she doesn’t really love them

She just sounds pretty ignorant... Why does she care what pet someone chooses to have? They’re really cool to look at and they have tons of personality, which she won’t get to see because she’s too ignorant. It’s her loss lol.

 

IMO a fish tattoo would look wayyyy cooler than a dog tattoo. Also this mentality she seems to have is really dumb lol. If she got a tattoo of her dog to justify how much she loved it, than she should tattoo a picture of her mom, dad, or whoever she says she loves as well and if she doesn’t, that must mean she doesn’t really love them

She just sounds pretty ignorant... Why does she care what pet someone chooses to have? They’re really cool to look at and they have tons of personality, which she won’t get to see because she’s too ignorant. It’s her loss lol.

I know, right?

 

IMO a fish tattoo would look wayyyy cooler than a dog tattoo. Also this mentality she seems to have is really dumb lol. If she got a tattoo of her dog to justify how much she loved it, than she should tattoo a picture of her mom, dad, or whoever she says she loves as well and if she doesn’t, that must mean she doesn’t really love them

She just sounds pretty ignorant... Why does she care what pet someone chooses to have? They’re really cool to look at and they have tons of personality, which she won’t get to see because she’s too ignorant. It’s her loss lol.

I know right! I even went to the extent of explaining how our ecosystems can house fish and plants from all over the world which we’d otherwise not always see in the wild yet to no avail.

Thank you for your kind words, I’m definitely starting to feel better with everyone’s kind words

Yeah. To him, fish are just decor. If a fish suffers for days and slowly dies of ammonia poison, he won’t give a fig. His plan for a fish tank is a 100 trout tank/pond, and when I said 100 gallons is to small for trout, he said he would make a super powerful current so it was like the fish were in more water then they were, and when I said it didn’t work that way, he ignored me.

Luckily, he doesn’t really have any interest in fish, so he will probably never do anything like that (I hope...).

Let’s hope he doesn’t keep them or he does learn more before!

 

Dogs are for people who want pets who "love" them because they provide food.

If you want a child substitute, get a dog. If you want a pet whose trust you have to earn, look elsewhere.

Dogs are loyal to ANYTHING that feeds them

 

If you want a child substitute, get a dog. If you want a pet whose trust you have to earn, look elsewhere.

Cats!

 

Dogs are for people who want pets who "love" them because they provide food.

If you want a child substitute, get a dog. If you want a pet whose trust you have to earn, look elsewhere.

Dogs are loyal to ANYTHING that feeds them

LOL so true this made me laugh, my dog followed me around begging for food all day....my turtle begs too.... so does my kid....in conclusion Food=love

 

Forest Gump, "Stupid is as stupid does."

I own four dogs, one cat, and have two aquariums. For me not one of them is exclusive from the other. They all need feeding, attention, and love.

There are somethings a person has to do just for themselves and his/her own personal enjoyment. Fish keeping is mine. I know not one other person that keeps aquariums. The closest fish keeper I have living near me is the bait house down the road that sells fishing minnows.

Friends and family don't care about fish keeping, they just ignore this big fish tank setting in my living room like its not even there.

 

Just point out that you don't have to follow your fish around with a scooper when he has to go to the bathroom.

 

Until someone gets into taking water pets into their home they will never understand the joy tending to our tanks and the life in them gives us. Please know that we are here and we understand where you are coming from. The best thing you can do with folks like that is just walk away. Some folks will never see what we see or feel what we feel.

I will say one thing. There is no one in the world that loves their dog more than I did my sweet Mattie Marie but even so I would never consider having a tattoo of her on my body. She lives on in my heart, not on my skin.

 

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how **** I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

I've no real right to respond to you. But I hope I can perhaps find the words to help put this into perspective. I'm 58. I have a 13 year old daughter and her Mum, my partner has been with me for 34 years now. I'm Mr. Average. Except for the last four years I have been rebuilding my life after a serious illness. That illness went undiagnosed or incorrectly diagnosed for four decades. During which time my life slowly but surely fell apart as the "condition" deteriorated. My condition changed my behaviours. For the worse. There wasn't a part of my life that wasn't totally destroyed by this illness. My relationships suffered, my family suffered, my finances were ruined, my social network broke down. Four years ago I self referred to a sleep specialist in London and within four months was correctly diagnosed and on the road to recovery.

I'm learning to like myself again. To love myself again. To respect my rights to have an opinion that others will not agree with. It's been a living he ll.

But here I am. I can't tell you how to deal with the hurt that you feel when others are cruel. We all have our coping mechanisms. We all find ways to enjoy our spare time. I've got dogs, fish and a hamster (all my daughters). She is taught to respect animals to look after their needs and to understand the minutia and detail.

I often find myself referring to a prose poem written by Max Ehrmann. It has no copyright protection in the US. However, I won't copy and paste it here but leave a link to his words.

Desiderata

The only person I or anyone needs to approve of keeping fish, dogs, cats is me or themselves.

AiYn'U

 

If you're happy with fish that's all that matters. The problem with some people is they have irrational thought processes. You cant argue rationally with them and the best u can do is tell em to go back to the pond since they wanna be a silly goose. Dont let them make u feel any less joy about what u like.

 

Asked my young daughter, "Do you want a puppy?" She said "No." So I continued, "How about a kitten?" the answer came back "No thanks." So I gave up and said, "What should we do?" To my surprise she said, "Let's get a betta." So we have a 5 gallon tank, "Silky" is happy with a Nerite and my daughter is smarter than your sister's friend!

 

I'm 59. I know this may not help much, but one of the things most people learn as they get older is to care less about the opinions of others. If your sister's friend doesn't like fish and thinks dogs are superior, okay. You don't have to care. She's entitled to her opinion and you're entitled to yours. If she's mean about it just ignore it.

There will likely come a time in her life that she will look at that tattoo of her dog and think "How could I have been so stupid?"

 

I hope you can let go of her unkind words. I feel your pain as a person who prefers dogs that belong to other people. I get tired of being shamed for not thinking dogs are the best thing since blue jeans, and my relatives and friends refer to me as "the crazy fish lady" all the time (even though I am FAR less crazy over my fish than some of our friends here!). I'm ok with it. I sleep well at night knowing that my pets aren't going to eat my shoes while I'm in bed.

 

That sounds like a frustrating conversation indeed, and like others have said it's best to just let other people have their pet preferences since it doesn't mean much in the grand scheme. Certainly that girls' tattoo of a dead dog is odd. But then again, as much as I love keeping fish, I've fully admitted to friends that an aquarium is basically a silent TV with 1 channel which will die if you don't watch it enough.

 

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how **** I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

Don’t beat yourself up over it. Sone people are dog people, others cat people, and still others fish people. Fish absolutely have personality!!!!! My betta has personality fir days, and that’s how I knew he was sick recently and and I am now treating the tank. If he didn’t have a personality I would have never known he “acting” out of the ordinary. Even my rabbit snail shows personality! Your betta is beautiful. Enjoy the fish you have, because I know after a hard day you come home and watch them and it us soothing. Something all pets provide their owners with.

 

people should respect others hobbys. It infuriates me when someone criticizes someone for something they enjoy.

 

Or as we say in the South..."Don't yuck on someone else's Yum."

 

Another thing they say down South, "Well bless your little ol' heart!", when they don't want to cuss someone out.

 

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

I don’t love my fish enough to get a tattoo of them? Then why do I have a plushie of a deceased betta of mine?



I agree, I don’t think I would tattoo any dead pet (or relative, etc.) on my body. Branding myself with their image/constant reminder seems really depressing.

No, it doesn’t mean you love him less. We’re all different and show love in different ways.
I have plushies of all my pets, alive and dead. I also can’t actually cuddle my fish, so I have plushies to cuddle instead.

 

I don’t love my fish enough to get a tattoo of them? Then why do I have a plushie of a deceased betta of mine?
View attachment 710199

I agree, I don’t think I would tattoo any dead pet (or relative, etc.) on my body. Branding myself with their image/constant reminder seems really depressing.

No, it doesn’t mean you love him less. We’re all different and show love in different ways.
I have plushies of all my pets, alive and dead. I also can’t actually cuddle my fish, so I have plushies to cuddle instead.

I don't know what a plushy is, but you sound very sensible about the tattoo thing. I know tattoos are in style now, but I wonder how many of the people getting them will still think it was a good idea in twenty years? As my wife says, "That canvas isn't going to stay tight." Considering the permanence of tattoos I don't think any one should get one until he or she is at least 30.

 

I don't know what a plushy is, but you sound very sensible about the tattoo thing. I know tattoos are in style now, but I wonder how many of the people getting them will still think it was a good idea in twenty years? As my wife says, "That canvas isn't going to stay tight." Considering the permanence of tattoos I don't think any one should get one until he or she is at least 30.

A plushy is another word for stuffed animal, a soft toy. With a plushy, I can hold on to that pet as long as I need to until I’m ready to let go and move on, then put it away. With a tattoo, I can’t let go and I’m forced to hold on, which seems unhealthy to me.

However, some people get tattoos as their method of grieving, which is fine for them. I once met a dog breeder (she was probably in her 50s) who had a tattoo of all her past dogs. There were quite a lot of tattoos, but she loved them and had no regrets for getting them. She also didn’t antagonize me for not having any tattoos of my pets. The person who put down LadfromLondon is nothing more than an immature mean girl.

I think “the canvas isn’t going to stay tight” is great.hilarious

 

First things first, man do I apologise to getting back to all your lovely responses so late! It has been a busy week indeed. It goes without saying I have been very touched by you all, sharing your personal thoughts, stories and support. This conversation really did give me an insight into just how much I do care about my buddies, and that I don’t just see them as a pretty fish to feed and care for.

I wasn’t expecting such an overwhelming response from you all, and it really has made me feel better about the whole ordeal and brought a smile on my face! It‘a very settling to know I always have a community of amazing people, fish keepers or not on this forum to turn to when I feel like I need to get something off my chest. I can only hope you all feel the same and know if you ever feel like sharing something, whether it be with me or the community, we’ll all be here to support.

Thank you all for your kind words once again, I truly appreciate it!

 

I love and adore my dogs. I had a pet bird for 21 years.
I had a pet rabbit for 5 growing up

I never , ever could have understood fish until I had my own.
My silver dollar fish come to the tank and swim in front of me like little dogs waiting for a treat

last year when I got them, they had dark round marks that faded - i worried until I read it's like a mood ring, it means they are content & happy!

My featherfin hid 24/7 for months! now he actually makes eye contact & observes me. Oh and when he eats larve, he dances! he smells it in the water & gets excited! how cool is that?

most ppl have no interest in fish - their loss.

for me, it makes me happy & very zen when taking care of them. It's not about what I get from the pet, but what I can do to make them happy. It's nurturing & realizing

 

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how bad I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

When people think of pet fish the first thing that comes to their mind is a goldfish in a bowl, and how that fish always kept dying no matter what you did, people who got a fish, and didn't have any knowledge at get a fish and think of how easy it was, and how quick that fish went on just like the next, what they didn't stop to think about was what it is they did wrong, they think it is normal for fish to quickly die and don't put effort into keeping them healthy, that is why in the pet world, people belittle fish, think of them as a Dumb waste of time, i constantly have to deal with family members around me thinking i was mentally insane because of all the things i do for my fish, and how much love i show them, and the money that goes into them,(and by god its a lot) its is just one of the many things us fishkeepers have to deal with, there are a lot of stubborn people in this world, and all we can do is roll with the punches. Keep doing what you love man, don't let anyone stop you, you always have the community on here to come to!

 

So I spent the last 45 minutes or so in a heated discussion to say the least about fishkeeping. This was with my sister’s best friend, who has no experience or intentions of keeping or understanding fish. The ‘discussion’ was more belittling of fish and in favour of dogs, the argument being they have no personalities or ‘it’s hard to believe they have distinctive behaviours’. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fish are as affectionate as dogs, but I don’t expect anyone to laugh or smirk in someone’s face when they talk about their pets when you have asked.

I’d also like to add this was a conversation regarding my Betta, and as you all know, Betta’s have insane amounts of personality. The conversation turned quite sour, when I was told I’d not be giving an equal amount of love to my fish which I’d be keeping in groups, or as we know them schoolers. This really hurt to say the least, when we all, no matter the fish, or the tank size, do nothing short of our best for any of our buddies, whether it be snails or Tetras.

I was then told ‘You wouldn’t get a tattoo of your dead fish’, (She has a tattoo of her dead dog) and yes I wouldn’t. Does that mean I love him less than she loved her dog?

All in all, I feel very, very low about what has just happened and I guess there’s just no winning with some people. I figured I’d share with the community what has happened, because if anyone gets what we do, it’s fellow fishkeepers or at the very least, enthusiasts.

This has definitely hit me more since this has happened since keeping my first fish, my Mahachai. Naturally, I’ve felt it has been very rewarding and we’ve gone through a lot with each other these last few months so yes, I will defend him and any other fish I keep. I hope none of y’all ever have to go through an emotional ordeal like this one, especially when you can’t do more than politely explain different fish have different behaviours as she’s your sister’s best friend.

There’s a picture of my lil’ guy in question, and I cannot put into words how bad I have been made to feel after this, ESPECIALLY when I know his behaviour/quirks.

I am sorry she made you feel that way. That is a beautiful fish and looks like a completely happy betta. It is hard to keep a betta's fins and color so nice. You must be taking good care of that fish. Lucky fish.

 

So sorry this happened to you. Some people are full of garbage. It's so ignorant to say you don't love a pet because you don't do something like get a tattoo. That's complete garbage and it doesn't dictate how much you love a pet. Some people will never get us.

 

I would totally get a tattoo of a fish. . . Just saying