First of all, how exactly is he acting? No Bettas, while they are prone to depression, are not normally depressed. They do this when there is something wrong. This may be the sign of just being lonely, or it may be the start of disease, or it may be constipation, or it may be that he doesn't like his environment for some reason.
Is he responding to you when he hasn't been depressed?
Is he new to you? How long have you had him? If he is new to you, the newness is probably the problem. It takes time for a Betta to build up a relationship with a human. They are culturally deprived for the first part of their lives and they think alone is what they are meant to be. It takes much work to develop the trust. Handfeeding is a trial and error (mostly error at first) way to develop the trust and probably the very best way to make a personal contact with a Betta. I agree with Butterfly that more than one person in the family needs to learn to handfeed but for the first little bit one person is probably all he can handle. Until you have established the rapport with him, he is going to be standoffish.
If on the otherhand, you have had him for a while and he has shown closeness to you and come to you before and now is not, then you have a problem of some kind. I would start with the disease issue first just in case.
Is there any change in his eating habits?
Does there appear to be any change in his swimming? More activity? Less actiivity? Shimmying when he swims (sign of constipation)?
Is there any change in his appearance? Look VERY closely, sometimes the change can be VERY small. Get a flashlight and turn off the light and shine the flashlignt on him after you have checked him in the light just to make sure he doesn't have Velvet.
Is the water quality good? What are the tests for Ammonia, Nitrate, and Nitrite readings?
What is the temperature of your tank? Do not go by the thermostat on your heater, go get a thermometer and check to make sure that your heater is working properly. It should be checked clear across the tank from the heater to make sure your heat is being distributed to all the water.
Is he goiing to the top of the tank occasionally to butt the top of his head against the surface of the water? If not this is serious as this is how they "breathe" through their Labyrinth organ.
The answers to these questions are going to mean taking time and really watching and spending time getting to know him in ways you probably haven't yet. If he is not liking his food or something in his tank, that is something you will have a chance to see when you spend time watching him as well. He will just plain avoid it.
But my true and honest opinion will run with either chance that he is getting sick or he is lonely or bored.
One simple thing you can try if you have him coming to get his food is giving him the frozen pea treatment instead of his regular food for one meal. Get One frozen pea - like the kind from the grocery store- and defrost it for 30 sec in the microwave. Don't cook it or it will just sink. Remove the skin an cut it up in tiny pieces and feed him enough to equal about half the size of his eye. (His stomach is about the size of his eye.) This is a harmless non-chemical treatment for constipation and won't hurt him even if he isn't. If this should be the problem, and for some reason Bettas are prone to constipation, it may be a quick and rather inexpensive fix for the problem. If it is not the fix, you should still probably keep them on hand if you are going to keep a Betta because I can nearly promise that even if you try very hard to keep it from happening, someday you will have a constipated little Betta.
I am so sorry not to be more helpful, but I really do need to know some of the information I asked for to make a good answer. If he shows any of the above problems or even if you have any more symptoms I haven't mentioned, PLEASE let us know. I do want to help.
Rose
